Octopus

Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 472 points –

I really hope they fully cooked that takoyaki I ate....

88

Flexible enough? Sure.

But will it withstand my stomach acids?

Bro, it lives underwater, in the ocean, where there's sharks and shit. It doesn't care about your stomach acid.

It lives in water with salt. The average ocean pH value is 8.1. It's a brain coated with a thin bit of goo.

My stomach is about 1.5 pH.

You could easily go through a waterslide, but if I change the water to be hydrochloric acid, you're not gonna come out as fresh as you went in. And most skin on the face and body has a pH of between 4.7 and 5.75.

In addition, pH is a logarithmic scale, a pH of 3 is 10x more acidic than pH 4

Genuine question: what is the point of logarithmic scales? Why can't we have a linear scale of 3 to 30 instead of 3 to 4? A linear scale works perfectly fine in most cases (for example the Scoville scale which goes from something like 3 for a green pepper to 20 million for a reaper), so why can't pH do the same?

Well, sure, you could, but would you rather write that a substance has a pH value of 11, or the absolute value, which is the hydrogen ion molar concentration, which would be 0.00000000001?

https://www.fondriest.com/environmental-measurements/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/ph_units.jpg

Especially since what we consider the neutral point, is a pH value of 7 (pure water). So then, for an example, if you have 3 substances, they have the values of 0.0000043, 0.00000003, and 0.0000005. are they acidic? Or basic? It's really difficult to tell at a glance.

And sure, you could have a different measurement like set water as 0 and positive are acids and negative are bases or something, but then you just move further away from the actual definition of acidity.

Can it go the other way?

Yes, you can enter an octopus' mouth, wriggle around through its digestive tract, and exit their anus. And when you're done, you can eat the octopus shreds from it popping like a you-filled balloon.

Thanks to you my search history now contains octopus anus.

Vs the usual octopus in anus or octopus anus insertion?

I’m pretty sure 90% of search histories have an octopus in anus variant in them.

90% of my search history is animal anuses.

While I'm totally joking, I for realsies create calendars filled with pictures of animal's butts that I take at the zoo

That's one of my favorite episodes. I felt so understood. I started taking pictures of animals' butts when I mistimed a pic of a hippo swimming by. I was so amused that it was unlike any other photo you'd normally see of a hippo, but you knew it was a hippo. So I expanded to other animals.

After one trip, I mentioned to my family that I got photos of over 14 animals' butts and my sister said "great, you can make a calendar now." And so it all began.

Something an incredibly large number of people do not understand is that solid objects cannot pass through you: anything larger than 1-2mm will not get past the Pylorus Sphincter at the end of your stomach.

Any claims otherwise are misled bullshit.

EDIT: Lots of typos

I never threw the quarter i swallowed at 6 years old back up, doc said it likely passed. Thats hella bigger tam 1-2mm and there's no quarters showing up on imaging... so how exactly does that work?

Not saying I don't believe this its just that reconciling this statement with real world experience isn't adding up.

And now I'm picturing the 'Little Book of Calm' getting absorbed and Bill Bailey running around looking like Jesus and quoting it. I never walked around like moose jesus so I guess I didn't absorb it.

Coins will dissolve within a month, pass once small enough. US Quarters are Copper with a plating of Copper Nickel Alloy, all of which will dissolve in acid.

https://learn.pediatrics.ubc.ca/body-systems/gastrointestinal/suspected-foreign-body-ingestion/

Looks like you typoed the unit of measure. Thats 2 cm, not mm, 10x bigger.

However, exceptions include sharp or toxic bodies, objects too large to pass through the pyloric sphincter (greater than 2Γ—6 cm),

Conflicting Sources

https://ucanr.edu/datastoreFiles/608-87.pdf

The pylorus contracts to slow gastric emptying and results in further mixing of gastric contents. During this time, the stomach transforms its contents into multiphase slurry called chyme, which is a combination of separate phases of aqueous solutions, fats, and solids. The more intense peristaltic waves promote antral empty- ing, which allows gastric contents, mainly fluid mixed with small particles, to pass through the pylorus and enter the duodenum. The particle size of the food emptied through the pylorus is less than 1 to 2 mm during the fed state (Thomas 2006).

and the Thomas Citation:

Thomas A. 2006. Gut motility, sphincters and reflex control. Anaesthesia Intens Care Med 7(2):57–8.

I think yours is the typo.

I don't read any conflicts here, in fact it seems the blurb you shared is speaking to normal food particle size that passes though, while the one I shared talks about maximum foreign object size that can pass.

When I was a kid, I passed a marble. It was quite painful when exiting the stomach, but I'll never forget the sound of it hitting the porcelain afterwards.

Explain corn in poop

An unchewed kernel is about 7.5mm in diameter.

The kernels are already popped or deflated as they enter the intestines, the loose corn kernal skins pass through like so.

It’s called octopussying and you NORMOS and vegans STAY AWAY from OUR KINKCOMMUNITY (/s)

And that's why you should never trust an octopus.

You wouldn't see us squid doing anything like that. Ick.

Pretty sure that's not true...

If they weren't too big or have to swim through all the digestive juices, it would be entirely possible

For clarification, too big means larger than a millimeter for the human stomach.

You would be correct, the Pylorus Sphincter stops anything larger than 1 to 2 millimeters in size from entering the intestines. Solids do not oass through human beings.

I mean, some octopodes are pretty small. The real issue is them moving through the GI tract. They might be flexible enough, but propelling themselves forward consistently would be the real feat.

More importantly nothing larger than a millimeter is getting past the stomach, ever.

Aye that's part of what I was saying. Now, the argument could be made that if the octopus is smart enough to have the goal of moving through the tract, they could muscle open the sphincter. I haven't ever tested an octopus against a sphincter. The controlled variable would have to be octopus size...

Off hand, I think the sphincter would win out until the octopus is too big to fit through without rupturing other areas.

Hey, if we can make a pencil out of leaves, cephalopods can swim through our GI tract like species 8472 through fluidic space.

The problem isn't the space it's the acid.

No, the acid takes time, the bigger issue is the Pylorus stopping solid food.

what kind of octopus are we talking? How big?

It's a known fact that as long as their mouth fits through the hole, the rest will follow, but it must be pretty small for it to move through your entire GI tract.

Now the spooky thing is that it's probably intelligent enough to do it, assuming it doesn't die somewhere along the way.