If your family weren't your family, would you still talk to them?

Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world to Ask Lemmy@lemmy.world – 92 points –
63

My family IS my family and I don't.

Correct. I give a 2 minute chat with Mom on: her bday, Mother's Day, and Christmas. That's it. Not sure how many more. She's 87.

I don't speak with my 3 older siblings. I'll be forced to speak with my sister that lives with my Mom when it comes time to spread Mother's ashes. If, she let's me know.

I don't talk to a lot of people, but there's no reason I'd specifically avoid them. I lucked out, and they're pretty cool people.

More to the point, my family are the people who shaped who I am in both nature and nurture. If they weren't my family, I would not be me.

If my family weren't my family, they wouldn't talk to me...

That's what I would say too. I love my family and they love me, but I think had we not been related they wouldn't choose to be around me. They are rather boring people and their favorite thing to do is sit at home and do nothing. I like to do stuff and try new things. They don't.

My mom and sister - Yes, they cool

My dad - He trolls liberals as a pass time and is effectively a MAGAt. No

You should troll your dad. I don't know if they sell these, but you should see if you can find a "Make Harris Great Again" hat. All red, with white text, in that same font.

Then take his MAGA hat, and in the place he put it, you place this one. See how long he takes wearing it before he figures it out.

No MAGA hat. Canadian

Which makes his support for the GoP even more ridiculous. Also makes me wonder where the fuck he's getting Fox News since it's NOT easy to get in Canada, ESPECIALLY before streaming and broadband

Your father is a weird man. Obsessed with politics of a country that he's not a part of, in support of a man who wouldn't piss on him if he were on fire. And now he's going out of his way to reach a "news network" (airquotes doing some heavy lifting on that one) that only spews a facist agenda.

Now, in contrast, I would say 100% of Americans have NO IDEA who's even running for president in Canada, or Mexico. Like......those thoughts are so far from what my brain thinks of, it's insane. Last night I was wondering which would happen first: A snail traverses an entire city, or a gallon of water evaporates in mild tempatures.

THAT thought crossed my mind long before thinking of Canadian politics. Sorry Canada, you're a great country, and I wish I lived there instead of here, but your money is monopoly colored, and your politics are irrelevant on the world stage.

Yeah. I hate that the GoP virus has infected our country

Our politics are somewhat relevant though, namely as we're between you guys and Russia

100%? That’s insulting, lol. Some Americans are informed about international politics, just not most.

It's Facebook and YouTube probably. My dad is also in Canada and obsessed with American news but he watches CNN on a loop so at least it's not the MAGA people he's supporting.

Still though, worry about your own country. We got our own issues we should be focusing on here.

Hell yeah. My family is weird and fun.

I play in a weekly D&D game with my dad, aunt, uncle, and cousin's husband. We all have weird craft habits.

Then I married into a massive family of very decent people. My brother in law adopted three sons before having two of his own. Several of the extended family teach or taught in public schools.

Then there's my extended family of cool people, friends I've curated over decades, most of whom have met my actual biological family.

Takes a lot before I give up on family!

2 more...

No. I have nothing in common with any of them. If I met one from work out such I’m sure we’d be friendly but I can’t imagine more.

they are ultra religious, i am agnostic, not fun, would avoid

If I somehow met my sister as like a friend of a friend, we'd get along. As for the rest of my family, I'm just waiting for them to die so I don't have to answer their phone calls anymore.

My mother/brother/sister, yeah - sure. My wife/daughters/son - Probably not. I look at them every day and wonder how I got so lucky.

Definitely thought that was going another way. Good for you, I'm sure they're proud of you too :)

They're fine people, but we don't really share any interests. I'd be unlikely I'd ever meet them.

No.

We're like the random other adults you interact with sometimes, because you live near them or something. We get along when we have to talk. If it wasn't for holidays each year we never would.

I lucked out and my family are really good and are honestly rather nice people to talk to and be around. But I also really suck at starting conversations, so they'd have to take the lead.

... I've recently been trying to make more of an effort to talk to my mum. She won't be there forever, after all.

My dad, probably. My mom, absolutely not. Of course, I barely talk to anyone I don't live with, and I'm 38, so I wouldn't actually talk to either of them.

2 more...

I talked to my parents. But not my sister because there were enough people on here who spout incoherent conspiracy theories. I don't need to hear it in person.

Did you know that there are pyramids, built by an ancient technologically advanced civilization, under the Atlantic Ocean? Because my sister does. Also the covid vaccine is bad for you, but that's a boring one.

But not my sister because there were enough people on here who spout incoherent conspiracy theories.

Well.....did you know the JFK dhooting had one shooter.....twice??? Lee Harvey Oswald in the library.....and LEE HARVEY OSWALD IN THE GRASSY KNOLL???!!!

Yeah. Betcha didn't consider time travrl, did'jya??? And then his best friend Jack Ruby shoots and kills the later timeline Oswald, allowing earlier timeline Oswald to move to Cleveland, and live his life where nobody was looking......in the 2010s in Cleveland!!!

Dun dun dun!!!

Yeah....I've been drinking....so what??

My younger brother: absolutely. He's funny AF and knows a lot of stuff I don't.

The rest of them: oh hell nah.

They are my family and I don't talk to them, because BPD destroys relationships.

This is really tough. I have two members who have such problems they are basically wards of the state. They are the only folks I know living in halfway houses. I doubt I would know them if they were not family. This sorta goes for many members to. They are fine but we move in different circles and they are not likely to be part of my crowd. Heck even my favorite brother tends to be a bar fly and way back when we might have met in a library or such. Im sure I would think of him as the cool guy from the library and maybe we would talk a bit if we bumped into each other there.

I'll be honest, every time I feel like I can express my opinions about my family one of them manages to find it. This may be how I learn I have cousins on Lemmy.

So I'll just mention my parents, who've become more like friends since my physical distance from them has increased over the last 20 years. And they're all (including step-parents) weirdly (considering their siblings, nieces, and nephews) progressive.

Finding your family on accident on lemmy is WILD

One of them, but none of the rest.

Some I would definitely talk to regularly, some I already don't talk to even though they are family.

Nah, probably not. They're fine but I have not much in common with them. I talked to one sibling for the first time in five years last year. I send another a happy birthday text once a year. I talk to the one living parent a couple times a year. Theres no bad blood between them and I.

We are a pretty independent family anyway, always have been. I see friends call up their parents weekly or even daily and I find it so strange to have a connection to them like that. Who just...calls up a family member randomly?

No and I'm already to that point.

It's just my two older brothers that are left. One is a narcissist and not worth my time. The other is a rabid Gravy SEAL who would rather have Kyle Shittenhouse as his brother than me.

It's not just politics that separates me from them, there is a lot of family history of disrespect and attempted abuse.

LMAO fuck no

Moral and societal obligations are the only two reason I have anything to di with any of them

There are better members of my family, and there are worse. I'd keep relations only with people who deserve it.

Half of them, no. They don’t understand me, don’t respect me, and think their opinion is the same as objective fact — and think Google is their credible source for all things. In fact, when the one person dies who is the only reason I speak to that side of the family, I’ll probably just stop, since I’ll no longer feel any obligation to do so.

The ones who are left, yes.

My dad if he was still living, yes.

The family of my ex aren't family anymore and I do talk to them too.

My mom I wasn't close to. My many siblings I get along with fine but don't see often. My kids are closer with me and with each other, maybe it skips a generation. They don't talk to their dad much but he burned that bridge.

I wouldn't talk to my kids. Someone might think I were a pedophile.

Yes. I would definitely want to. If you love your family then you would hopefully agree with me.

My family have lots of interesting things to talk about, and I could only find out by being willing to listen. That's also why you should try to respect your family, especially your parents.