O.J. Simpson, former football star acquitted of murder, dies at 76.

18-24-61-B-17-17-4@lemmy.world to News@lemmy.world – 446 points –
OJ Simpson, former football star acquitted of murder, dies at 76
abcnews.go.com

Actual article title: O.J. Simpson, former football star acquitted of murder, dies at 76.

108

In an odd coincidence, the real killer reportedly died at the exact same time.

Norm?

deleted by creator

I didn't fully get Norm's comedy until I learned

  • he intentionally held the joke too long as a schtick
  • he had little fear
  • he didn't worry about dead silence
  • he'd do the dumb shit just for the experience of being the guy to do that

It's becoming clearer now. It seems the only experience he kept to himself is the one that took him.

"On April 10th, our father, Orenthal James Simpson, succumbed to his battle with cancer."

Asked to comment, the cancer claimed innocence and vowed to catch the real killer.

(that one's for you, Norm)

If the cancer type does not fit, then you must acquit.

I was looking into the people involved, and Don Ohlmeyer, the guy who had Norm fired from SNL in 1998 for his OJ jokes, died of cancer in 2017. Norm did in 2021. And now OJ. Fuck cancer (and also OJ).

This just makes me miiss Norm McDonald

How many of the weekend update jokes did he write? I assumed they mostly came from the writer's room (and that he may or not be there, but it at least wouldn't be all or maybe even mostly him)

Your montage is just a link to youtube. Well played?

He sent you to YouTube. What, you need him to find the video for you too? Lazy ass millennials.

He sent you to YouTube. What, you need him to find the video for you too? Lazy ass millennials.

Seriously? I don't think it's too far out of the norm to expect a link to point to an actual video, and not just the website.

They were joking

I wondered, but I didn't see the /s, so... /shrug

Also, I've literally heard Boomers say "Lazy ass Millennials" before, and mean it. /shrugagain

I know millennials that are grandparents. I think you should be able to figure it out, shrug-bro.

I think you should be able to figure it out, shrug-bro.

Maybe. It was so ambiguous though, it really could have gone either way, so I chose a side.

Oh, and, /shrug

11 more...
11 more...

I didn't put an /s because I honestly never believed someone would be dumb enough to think that was a serious post.

I'm honestly impressed.

11 more...
11 more...
11 more...
11 more...

Omg, fixed! Sorry. I meant to delete the timestamp part that was added to the URL, but absentmindedly removed too much...

11 more...
12 more...
12 more...

Me in high school watching the Bronco chase:

“Fuck, this asshole is going ruin the Naked Gun movies for me now.”

I used to worry about that too! Thankfully Leslie Nielson always was the true star so the movies hold up

One of the football greats, but the whole murder thing was a real bad look tbh

I would have led with murderer who happened to play football well, but that's just me

That makes no sense considering he was a terrible amateur murderer, but an incredible pro football player.

If Lebron died would you list him as an actor who happened to play basketball??

It was indeed a bad look in that economy, but you have to consider the times.

Bye Norbert. Too bad you turned out to be a cunt.

I know, it sucks. Naked Gun is one of my favorites, and he was great in it. Too bad he turned out to be a shithead.

I'm just going to pretend his role in Capricorn One was a government conspiracy.

I've heard Leslie Nielsen was a humorless prick in real life, too. But actors pretend to be someone they're not on screen, it's their literal job, so I still enjoy their work just fine.

One of the few times where you root for the cancer

It will be interesting to see what the Bills do. He played a bit before my time, but he was a big part of the Bills identity in the 70s.

I've heard lots of stories about how good OJ was at knifing through the backfield....

Are we still doing "phrasing"?

Oh nooo……who will the news channels reach out to now when they desperately need legal advice on critical issues like should it be illegal to pay hush money payment to a pornstar to influence the election outcome?

Such a tragedy

I was wondering why the world felt like it was a better place.

I'm glad that cancer was finally able to shake the OJ Simpson disease and is feeling much better.

Well. As Norm McDonald said, it's more of a draw: in this case the cancer also died when OJ died.

I know we can have both but there sure are a few people that I wish it was.

I personally think he was guilty and that the jury made the right decision. Such a fucking mess.

Yeah, the lawyer did a great job creating "reasonable doubt." I think if we want a justice system that defaults toward innocence, we have to be willing to let a murderer out on the streets for every 100 innocents who also walk. I'd rather have that result than jailing 100 innocents so we can catch the one murderer.

I really don't think the doubt was reasonable. At least I'm 100% certain he was guilty and was ever since I watched the car chase. The cops fucking up the investigation has no impact on what I saw with my own eyes.

An innocent rich man doesn't fucking run away from the cops and have to be talked out of suicide to face trial. No fucking way.

Tell us more about your illustrious legal career.

Reasonable doubt is a question for the jury, which requires no legal experience at all. Don't you feel silly?

I'd rather let 100 guilty men go free than chase after them

I personally think he was guilty.

So do the rest of us, there's mountains of evidence to prove that he was guilty.

and that the jury made the right decision. Such a fucking mess.

So you think he was guilty, and that it was appropriate for the jury to acquit him for the murder?

Explain to me please, why you think deaths were justified and that OJ deserved to walk free if he's guilty?

Because the prosecution failed to make their case, mishandled the evidence, and were torn apart by a well funded defense.

Nothing justifies the deaths, and I would not try to. But being able to mount a defense against charges made on you by the government is a cornerstone of our justice system.

Thus I do feel comfortable saying that I think he was guilty and that the jury acted properly. The case was NOT well presented at all, even with all the evidence they had.

"Justice" system. I have money so I can kill people.

The prosecution shit the bed so I can kill people.

OJ was the villain when it comes to the murdering, the prosecution team was the villain when it comes to bringing him to justice.

Ok, now, listen to me very carefully. It doesn't matter, how shitty the prosecution is, You still can't kill people. You realise that, right?

And you realize that when someone explains why X happened, that doesn't necessarily mean that they want X to happen?

I thought I was being excessively cautious when I threw in the statement that "OJ was the villain", I figured that went without saying but that I should put it in anyway just in case someone thought I was justifying his actions. But I guess I had to be even more explicit than that, there are folks who are really eager to have a fight here.

Are you intentionally missing the point that someone still has to prove you did it? Or do you just want random people to be convicted of murder since murder isn't allowed?

1 more...
1 more...
2 more...
2 more...
2 more...
8 more...

Oh no, now who will take up the mantle to find the real killer?!

Oh God! C'mon dude! It's the other fat guy in a red hat! Do I have to use one of my remaining wishes again?!!! Is that how prayers work now? But what if I think of a wish accidentally? Oh man, I was thinking about Boeing engine covers the other day and how flimsy they are. I didn't mean that wish, can I get back the credit? Oh shit, I have to take back the Mindy wish too! Sorry Mindy! I'm sure they do make bras for 3 boobs in double D's...right? Or can we take it back? Oh please take it back! Oh please God! Oh please St Peter, help me find my keys too..hey men!

Once a Bronco, Always a Bronco.

I hope he only lives up to 76 one time! Otherwise it sounds really painful if he keeps dying like that every single time he's 76.