I've recently turned 20. What highly specific advice you, lemmy users, would offer me?

Save 15%. Even if it absolutely sucks to do so. If you have to dip in to the 15%, it better be for life or death. Skip meals to save that 15%.

1$ saved at 20 is like 20$ saved at 40.

Also, don't cash advance from a credit card, ever, for any reason. I once bought a 6$ taco at age 18 on cash advance, and once I finally cleared it off, that taco had cost me almost 500$. I did the math.

Poop at work. Not only do you get paid to poop, you save money on toilet paper.

Go to party every day. Fuck everyone you can. Use all the drugs. You're going to miss this time when your body could take it all without problems.

Can all the young people not smoke cigarettes please. It's the one thing I regret in life.

There's obvious reasons like health and money, but there are specifics that you don't want, such as -

Emphysema. You don't want that.

Receded gums. It's not funny.

And you smell. Really bad.

Smoking kills, obviously. But it's the things it can do to you while you're still alive that are really horrible.

Your 30s will be better. Don’t get hung up on thinking your 20s are prime.

Install GnuCash, learn accounting, and start tracking your money and use proper financial language. There is a lot of good financial advice out there (budgeting, investments, debt reduction), and all of that is much more efficient if a) you know where your money goes and where it comes from, b) you are proficient with financial software, and c) you can talk to the banks in their own language.

If you start college (assuming you’re an American) do not under any circumstances drop out. This goes double for grad school. What will happen is the at you’ll still owe money on your student loan, but will not have whatever advantages you might have accumulated as a result of having a degree.

As an eastern European nearing their 30s in a situation much less extreme than yours - do not fall for "patriotism". I do not mean the "go and fight for your people" type. That takes guts and mentality I do not possess.

I mean the "doing X is unpatriotic" type. Usually comes from "patriotic" formations who follow a certain narrative and work for the interests of other countries. Look for buzzwords like traditional values, us vs them, targeting a group of people as a whole, claiming to get back "what is ours" (territory lost centuries ago, not currently occupied land). Big social media presence coupled with self-produced "reports" and "news articles" (bonus points if they have their own mass media channels) are also a giveaway.

Thank you but I won't let your aggressor, through puppet parties, dictate what about my attitude and views is patriotic and what isn't.

Here's my highly specific (hypocritical) advice:

Don't take advice from Reddit or Lemmy on any important matter. You don't know these people, and they don't know you. Some people have good ideas. Most don't. The ability to think for yourself and determine what's best for you is the best skill you can have. A review from Lemmy or Reddit on a product is fine. Life advice from internet strangers is almost always garbage.

Here's some more highly specific meta advice: Change your socks every day. What the fuck people..

Stay off TikTok.

Mimimize social media usage.
Start a pension fund.
Study. Get a higher education or professional qualifications.
Exercise regularly.
Take care of your dental hygiene. It's costly to fix.
Find a companion to share your life. Human or animal. Having to make compromises because you have someone depending on you is great.

Don't be a selfish prick. Show compassion and caring to your near and dear.

Don't repeatedly subject yourself to very loud music. Tinnitus is a bitch.

Do not fuck around with hard drugs.

Floss, brush your teeth daily and see a dentist at least once a year, eat less sugar and cut out soft drinks. Nothing worse than in losing or nearly losing one or two teeth in your 30s or 40s. Even without cavities, if you don't take care of your gums, you can lose perfectly healthy teeth because the gums were eroded away.

Do some weight training and keep up an exercise routine ... you can easily build muscle tone over the next ten years, after that you have to work a whole lot more to gain the same amount of muscle tone.

Eat less and eat healthy ... learn to eat better and just eat less but better food ... the sooner you learn this, the longer you'll keep the habit and the longer the habit in your life, the longer you'll live and the longer you'll live healthier. What's the sense of living to 80 when you end up sick and unhealthy for the last 20 years of your life?

Read, read, read ... read the classics, read history, and read as much and as often as you can to fill out your knowledge and awareness of as much as possible.

Do all this now because you will never gain the time to do it all later.

Never assume that you can do things when you're 30 when you're 40 or when you retire because those times will either never come or when those times come, you won't have the time or you will have so many other priorities that you won't do these things anyway.

So do all these things now while you can because later may not arrive or when it does, it won't be like you imagined it would be.

Go to another country for 1 year. A country with different culture and with a different language.

When it comes to buying furniture: Get secondhand furniture handed down by relatives, or found at thrift stores, Craigslist, Facebook Marketplace, garage sales, whatever. It's more eco-friendly to buy stuff that already exists, it'll probably cost less than brand-new furniture, and the older stuff is sturdier than anything you're going to get at Ikea.

With the money you save buying secondhand tables and drawers and such, buy a GOOD brand new mattress. You can cheap out on a lot of furniture, but never cheap out on a mattress. Decades from now, your back will thank you.

You have time on your side. You can afford to make a few mistakes.

And wear sunscreen (can't believe that song is >25 years old now)

The gals at the strip club don't actually care about you.

learn HOW to drink.

drinking isn't just about finding out how much it takes before you black out. AND FOR EVERYONE ELSE'S SAKE, DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE. if you're gonna drink, arrange transportation, or stay where you are.

also, read the Hagakure. there's some good stuff in there.

Consume some "older" media. Like Predator, Terminator 2, Kindergarten Cop, Cyborg, Star Trek TOS, Black Sabbath, David Bowie, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (book), Biggles.

Learn to Cook 3 or 4 different meals extremely well.

Not only is it good for your own health (mental & physical), but it will leave a great impression on others.

Get a good, ergonomic mattress, don't spare expenses. It will pay off in a decade when you'd otherwise start getting back pains.

Start a pension, now.

By the time you retire they're going to be even more valuable than they are today.

And thanks to the way they work, starting early with a small amount has a bigger impact than putting loads in when you're earning more later.

Whatever you want to do in life, start right away.

• If you want to start a business, start developing it and putting the pieces into place as soon as you can.
• If you want to be a artist/musician/writer/etc, take yourself seriously and start gigging or creating right away.
• If you want to reach the top of the academic pyramid, study more than what you're assigned and start developing your ideas.
• If you want to be involved in politics, then start getting involved in politics.
• etc...

I'm not saying this because it'll be too late if you don't, or anything like that. It's never really too late to change course or start doing what you want.

But don't wait until you're finished school. Don't wait until you feel "ready". Dispel is the idea that you're still a kid or that you're just going through the motions until your life really begins. Life is now. So, plant the seeds of your future as soon as you possibly can.

If you're American, your credit score affects a whole lot more than your creditworthiness. A bad, or even not as good score can affect your chances at getting a job, getting a place to live, and more commonly, how much you pay for car insurance.

We give a lot of shit to China over their social credit score, but we've had ours for years, we just pretend it's only for creditworthiness. When your job does pre employment checks, they can also do a credit check. Many apartment complexes do the same. Hell, even utility companies can check your credit and decide you are a risk and ratchet up your deposit.

It's not a guarantee that anyone does this, but it is a possibility. Be on your best behavior, citizen, the credit bureaus are watching.

Don't you dare to even blink. I did and suddenly i'm 30 years in the future for some reason.

Take care of you knees and back. Nothing spoils your 40s like bad knees or a bad back.

If you grew up with trauma (or even if not) and have anxiety and stress get that shit under control now or it will lead to painful chronic illnesses after 30. Read about ACES and learn how to manage stress now.

Make note of your friends phone numbers, emails and addresses (not just via social media), especially the ones from earlier years, and keep track of them with regular calls, notes or visits. Forty or fifty years from now, after the cycles of graduations, weddings, babies, moves, etc. you'll have some golden relationships.

If you have any issues (like mental health or physical health) that you feel you should address, do it. I didn't address my mental health problems until I was almost 30, yeah I should have definitely done it sooner. I also didn't really start fixing my teeth until my mid to late 20s, yeah I definitely should have done it sooner.

If you don't currently drink alcohol, don't start.

Edit: Also if you do drink either stop or learn to drink responsibly. You want to do that earlier rather than later as the conversation with a doctor that you'll die from drinking sooner rather than later isn't a fun one.

Gardening. Start with a cherry tomato plant. There’s nothing better than picking food you grew, and tending to a garden is a joy.

Learn to cook (which saves you money) and do all the house chores (including ironing).

Wear sunscreen

• Read The Courage To Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga It is a mind blowing book that can help to improve your life and that of others.

You should do 10 minutes of metta meditation per day.

Set the timer, sit up straight, bring your hands together, then think to yourself (one thought per exhalation)

• May I be protected and safe
• May I be free from sickness and suffering
• May I be peaceful and happy
• May I be free from troubles and worry
• May I be healthy and strong
• May there always be kindness and friendship in my life
• May I take care of myself with ease and joy

Once that's finished - seven breaths - pick someone else and say these things to them (silently in your own head), again one breath at a time.

Pick someone whom it's easy to wish well upon.

Once that's finished, pick someone of medium difficulty to feel good about. Maybe someone neutral.

Once that's finished, pick someone who's hard to feel good about. Maybe an enemy, or someone who disgusts you.

Then medium.

Then easy again.

Follow the pattern easy-medium-hard-medium-easy-medium-hard-medium-easy-.... until the timer goes off.

Normally I recommend starting a meditation practice with 5 minutes per day, but with 5 minutes and slow breaths you barely get through one person this way.

Smoke weed erry day.

Open a 401k account, and start contributing to it. Funds permitting, try to max out your yearly contributions as much as current rules allow. Doubly so if your employer does any sort of matching. It's pre-tax, and you won't feel it per paycheck, but it adds up over the years.

Don't think you know it all. It's extreamly common to see young people being confident and cocky, despite having almost no life experience. Understand the enormous value of listening to people who have been in your shoes before. Almost everyone you see was your age before.

And with listen, I don't mean "do what they say". Just listen and think about what they say. Maybe they are wrong. Maybe not.

Learn when and how to properly rest. It's easy to burn out for things that end up being not that serious. Prioritising your health and wellbeing is for the long run.

If you can be a good boy/girl, get a credit card. Start with something that returns actual value, like a grocery store card or gas card. Something you can use for ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING and then use the points or cash-back or whatever on necessities. Pay your bills with it, buy your groceries, use it everywhere you can.

Now, here's the important part: pay the statement balance IN FULL on or before the due date. If you pay the statement balance every month, you're basically getting a short term, 0% interest loan, and building your credit score at the same time.

Oh, and never get a credit card with any kind of annual fee or membership requirements. And when I said useful, I didn't mean the Belle Tire card that gives you discounts on tires. WTF Belle Tire, how many tires do you think I'm going to buy?

In case you missed the part where I told you to pay off the statement every month, here it is again. Pay off the statement every month. No excuses. If you can't pay for something in cash, don't buy it with the card. Once you miss a payment, they start charging that ridiculous interest rate on everything you buy on the day you buy it. Once you miss a payment, you must STOP USING THE CARD until the balance is zero.

But if I find out you're carrying a balance, I'll find you and kick your ass myself.

Don't be afraid to be average. There's nothing wrong with high aspirations and if that's what you want then go for it but down the line should you realize that the effort you've put in has not brought the future you may have hoped for please don't beat yourself up about it. Not everyone needs to be the best in their field or a CEO or whatever it is you want to do. There's no shame in being mediocre in your career. As long as you can provide a comfortable life for yourself and the people you care about you've succeeded.

I find that this mentality helps me especially because while I do want to be exceptional I am not at all afraid of failing in that goal. It's significantly less stressful.

Shit yourself

Wash your dick first.

Get a habit of tracking your habits. When you know everything you do while "on autopilot" and why, - you can outsource a lot of chores and work to your "autopilot" self by setting up your routines and habits correctly.

This skill is best learned as soon as possible, and it's a shame it's not taught in schools. 20s is a good time - all the momentum you gain within next 20 years can carry you the rest of the way.

Also, don't be hard on yourself for failing. You'll see tons of good advice - a lot of it will seem essential (like being financially responsible), for good reasons. Just know that failing at all these things does not necessarily make you a failure or a bad person. Who knows what struggles you might/will face - as long as you survive and take care of your loved ones, you should be ok. Ultimately that is all we can do.

Also, try to engage with physical things more: people IRL next to you, touch grass, craft something with your hands. Of it's not physical, it exists in your head, - and your head might not always be the best place to spend most your time.

Someone gave me good advice, and it has worked out well, so far. Put money away for retirement. Even a little bit will multiply as the years go on.

Develop a consistent meditation practice

Read black shirts and reds by Michael Parenti

Buy what you value, not merely what you can afford.

Start a meditation practice. Set aside time to sit quietly for 10+ minutes a day, not doing anything, without worrying about what you may or may not be accomplishing by doing so. Optionally look up additional basic instructions, but the specifics aren't that important.

Find time to talk to people in person, at least the ones that are close to you. Just go with them for coffee/snack/beer and talk without the aid of technology.

EDIT : Make it a rule to have coffee/snacks/drinks only in company of real people.

Save money, invest money. And enjoy what you have for as long as possible.

Therapy is useful and probably would help most people in at least a small way. We're finally at a point where it's not something people feel the need to hide. If there's anything in your life that you think may benefit from it, starting early can go a really long way.

I'm very far from who I was going to turn into because of the many valuable moments of insight found thanks to great therapists (three over ~30y). And don't write it off if you don't vibe with a therapist. Experience tells me that it's about a two-to-one ratio of bad fit to good. Asses in the first few sessions whether you think the person is a good fit and, if needed, move on.

if you're peeing outdoors, don't pee uphill.

Start habits, but small ones. Envision what your ideal "you" would do, whether that be eating clean, investing for retirement, reading, working out, running, etc, and then scale them way back and start today. If you envision your ideal self reading a book a week, read a few pages right before you sleep, and do it regularly until you form that habit. If you want to eat clean, start by looking at ingredient lists and try to pick more whole foods with less processing.

Your life is a journey to your better self.

Don't wait. Never wait. Things aren't going to get better, just do it now. There is no better time, if you want to do something do something.

My advice is: Don't take anyone's advice.

You're 20. This is the time for you to take a shot at whatever the fuck you want.

While it's good to dive into abstract philosophy, it's good to have practical skillset, especially something you can (for lack of better word) monitize one way or another.

I'm lucky that my passion and my education allow me to have some trade. I also know quite a lot of people who are in their prime, or even past, who regret not having any specific skillset they developed when they were younger. I definitely know more art students who are thriving more in food & beverage industry rather than actually in art.

One thing that I regret would be not maintaining all my relations with friends and acquaintances. It's harder to make friends as you get older.

Last but not least: don't burn thru your savings. In fact, try to make it grow, the sooner the better.

Have a sense of humor and don't be so serious all the time.

To prove that I don't struggle to understand what highly-specific means - read this book from eCover to eCover.

Given your examples are "Do this" kinds of advice, here's one with no malice or sarcasm: figure it out on your own.