Very thankful

CarbonAlpine@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 846 points –
150

You do you but I'm thankful that I have spare money to spend on supporting good porn

you mean tasteful art

If by tasteful you mean furry vore...

Then yeah, tasteful.

Hey, we're not here to kink shame.

I just pirate that porn, heck many of them charge for their OF while they post the same shit that's on their insta and when they do release something worthwhile you gotta dunk another 50 to get it.

While already spending 8 bucks a month just to see a mirror of their instagram.

Just sell the damn video for 58 bucks and leave out the bullshit part of the deal. They're just playing into addiction related habits to get you to spend more.

I had a very interesting interaction with an OF model. I made an account years ago to support a friend who was starting out there. I logged in a few days ago to see another model that had advertised on a different platform.

I get a notification of a message and it's one of the models where they have a free OF but everything is PPV.

I figured it was a bot and just ignored it but then got another notification. I figured I could just reply and say hi.

The model in question is a porn star (i.e. has videos on major production companies) but also has an OF. I subscribed because she's totally my type.

Anyway I'm having this back and forth with her and I'm wondering "this isn't a bot but....is it really her?"

And I got the sense that these professional models hire people to chat with people on their OF. That's nuts! I get that porn sells a fantasy. That's a given but I didn't expect that they would hire people to pretend to be them.

I had a similar experience but then I got a little uncomfortable because she started sending me weird cryptic messages

Stuff like "The operation failed with an error. [429] You have reached your OpenAI API limit. Please check your plan and billing details"

there's a massive industry of hiring people to pretend to be models, because there's huge money in personal experiences / personally tailored experiences. I listened to a podcast where they interviewed someone from the Phillipines who worked in the equivalent of a call center that was made up of people sexting in OF dms. A lot of people wouldn't pay for like pornhub premium or something like that, but would pay for "custom" content and "real" attention from their favorite performer

That was the key to know it wasn't really the model. She was trying to sell me on buying a photo set. I asked her if they were exclusive to me, to which she replied yes.

Then I asked her to do a custom pose (nothing scandalous; wanted to see how exclusive this was) and she said she couldn't do that.

At that point I said to her thanks but no thanks

But I agree. If she would have done that I probably would have paid for it. But not for pictures that everyone else.

Unfortunately because of the stigma and the defacto ostracization from certain aspects of society, not the least of which is financial, people in these industries are usually really callous when it comes to extracting money out of the clients. Not to mention the fact that most of society doesn't need porn or doesn't need it enough to consider paying for it.

I suppose it's tit-for-tat. The client objectifies them as a sex object, they objectify the client as a cash cow. But now I'm just describing most capitalist exchanges.

Drag queen Amanda Tori Meating has gone on the record about her day job as an OnlyFans ghostwriter. There's an entire industry of talent agencies that hire minimum wage gig workers to pretend to be the model you are paying $x per month to interact with.

I didn't expect that they would hire people to pretend to be them.

Why wouldn't they? Think about trying to respond to all of those people, every day, on top of doing everything else you need to do.

As I am learning it makes sense but here's how I think about it.

I'm very supportive of sex work. But I don't want to be tricked or misled.

If you're offering "exclusive" pictures that are taken just for me, I would expect that you don't sell them to anyone else. At that point, I'm contracting you for a specific job and paying for the product.

The crazy ones I've heard about are women looking for sugar daddies on dating websites. They set up profiles like any woman would but as you strike up a conversation, you find out that they just want someone to pay their bills.

So if an OF model is chatting with her fans, you go girl and do your thing. But don't make me think that I'm talking to you when really it's some low-wage employee in the Philippines who's gonna get fired because their upsale didn't work on me.

If you’re offering “exclusive” pictures that are taken just for me, I would expect that you don’t sell them to anyone else.

Nah. Work smarter, not harder

Do cam girls count? Because that's how I donated to the Ukraine war effort.

Quick question, is this a tax deductible donation? The IRS won't answer my emails on this

Don't know about donations through porn but a friend of mine used to be a whore. She misses tax deductible underwear.

I remember reading something ages ago that camsites are actually huge contributors to Russia, with many of the girls there being Russians pretending to be Ukrainian.

Yo! I really wish this was not the sentiment. Support the media you consume. Otherwise you don't know what sort of shady shit is going on.

Shady shit happens specifically because there is money to be made. If everyone around the world stopped paying for porn, full stop, then the only porn that would be made would be passion projects from artists who want to create for the sake of it.

Doubt it. People would still post revenge porn, unconsensually filmed stuff or leak e.g nudes that were meant for each other and not the public. Because the motivation there is not money, it would be to humiliate, for example.

Exploitation takes place when the money isn't paid directly to the workers. Anyone who cares to consume porn responsibly should consider this before they go to free hosting sites that make money from ad revenue and shady services.

ad revenue and shady services

So as long as there is money to be made?

Maybe they just have a partner they look at

My wife hates it when I masterbate to her. She's always like, ew gross, I'm on a conference call.

But Jennifer, also on the conference call, is always rooting for me 110%. We should all be more like Jennifer.

Porn is the only reason I am still married. After our second kid, my wife's already low sex drive dropped to asexual. She is a wonderful mother, but she is either willfully or ignorantly oblivious to any romantic advance. I get, on average, about one fully clothed, under-the-covers hand job every 6 months or so that's so unenthusiastic that I am reminded why I stopped trying to get her to do it. I am sexually starving. The only thing I want in the world right now is to feel the warm touch of someone who actually wants to touch me again, but I'd rather die, lonely, but married to her than let my kids grow up in a broken home.....

So ya, I jerk off to porn after she goes to bed.

Damn that sucks! Wouldn’t have believed somebody telling you on your honeymoon that so little intimacy was in your future, huh? No fair :( I hope that, if nothing changes, your coping mechanisms remain effective.

It's better to show your kids what is like to be happy and have your needs met than to show them being miserable and setling. Especially on their behalf.

Which would you rather for your kids?

Which are you showing your kids by example?

Do you have kids? I used to hate when people would ask me that question before I had kids, because it seems to imply that having them places your opinion on a higher tier. Now that I do, I try and avoid it as much as possible for that reason, but I do understand that parenting is one of the theaters where theory space, and optimal practice, can be very different. The fact is, they never have to know, at least until they're old enough to understand. They don't have to know that Dad is sad when he's alone with Mom, because we still have fun and laugh as a family when they are present. The lesson that I'm teaching them by example, is that it is better to have one bedroom than two, then to have to decide whether they want to live with mom or dad most of the time, that even though Mom and Dad civilly argue sometimes, we can still be a family, and be happy most of the time, rather than give up on a promise made before they were born because of factors they can't possibly understand yet.

Yeah. I had a dad that didn't get laid too. Sex is in the bottom layers of Maslow's hierarchy of needs, then intimacy is up higher as well. If you're not getting these things you're not going to be able to hide them. Your kids won't know why until they're much older WHY your not happy, but that is a sadness of the soul that nothing can hide.

You ever see one of your friends the day after they get laid and you just know. That's a kind of joy from having your needs met that you can't fake.

You're teaching your kids it's OK with someone who doesn't meet your needs. It's not.

Be with someone who makes you happy. Let your wife do the same. Show your kids what a happy marriage and happy parents look like so they can model their relationships that way. Don't continue the cycle.

Ah, yes. Let me tell the children that I'm getting a divorce cause wifey won't fuck me

How about, "Daddys leaving because he no longer in a loving relationship with mommy." Divorce isn't the end of the world.

Except it seems from the comment that they are still in a loving relationship, just not much of a sexual one.

If your partner does not acknowledge you as a sexual being, that isn't very loving.

Nobody is obligated to have sex with you

Ok, but your partner is obligated to understand your needs and if their determination is they will never have sex with you again you are being emotionally neglected.

They aren't being neglected just because someone doesn't want to have sex with them. That's such a strange take.

You don't seem to understand that they are inside a mandatory pact of sexual abstinence except with each other. That is what marriage is. She ensnared him to be his provider for life and to swear off sex with anyone else. And then decided to refuse having sex entirely You want your argument to have legs ? THEN KILL MANDATORY SEXUAL EXCLUSIVITY IN MARRIAGES

2 more...

If one person choses to be asexual after having a healthy sex drive until that point that does not mean the other person has to be asexual aswell. Why is this such a hard concept for you?

4 more...
6 more...
6 more...
6 more...
6 more...
6 more...

For real though, why is everyone heading straight to divorce, instead of talking about how to tap that wife

Cause it's condescending to explain to a person you don't know who has been in a serious relationship with a person you dont know for who knows how long that you can tap it if you're just an extra good boy.

Pretty condescending to tell somebody you don't know that they need to get divorced too. Tbh libidos can go to shit after kids so yeah. Maybe my funny joke wasn't so funny. Ah well, I always have had a crap sense of humour

I didn't say they should get divorced only pointed out that it's not that big of a deal.

Second only to a death, divorce is the biggest possible deal for a family, and I'm tired of people pretending like it's not. It's valid in cases of abuse, or if the unhappiness is to a degree where it becomes emotionally damaging to the kids, but divorce should not even be put on the list of available options. Divorce is what you do when none of the available options end up working.

Booooo

Edit: You got some real trauma there and should work that out. You act as though marriage is some force of nature or divine law. You can hype it up all you want but end of the day it's just two people working on a collaborative project. Wipe this illusion of social order from your brain. Society tries to order itself and human nature interferes. The more we allow ourselves to be human the less we will feel like we've failed society.

4 more...
4 more...
4 more...
4 more...
4 more...
4 more...
10 more...
10 more...
10 more...

The demand for sexual exclusivity by default is evil.What your wife is doing to you is animal neglect !

10 more...
10 more...
10 more...

The porn industry is so fucked, most actors don't see much regardless of the popularity of their videos. Fuck that.

It has never been easier to get money in the hands of your favorite performers. But it’s still harder than it should be.

(Fuck the prudes at Mastercard)

It's also easy to get your hands in your favorite performers with money. But harder than it could be

And still it's peanuts compared to what payment and platform providers make.

“Free market” just means “free to engage in corporate rent seeking”.

As opposed to other industries, where everybody gets their fair share /s

Expect porn doesn't require any education.

The only ethical form of pornography is furry porn but y'all ain't ready for that conversation

Also not one of those people who comment on porn.

funny comments on pornhub are best tho :D

As opposed to not so funny and now deleted messages on Nude Africa?

What?

Oh, I saw this one! The website used Comic Sans MS or something like that, and that's how I found it out!

It’s my understanding that the most ethical forms of porn is not free.

Free range porn.. caged or not, depending on preference

I'd pay if there was a more discrete way of doing it. Overall, you should pay for the things you want. Or they will go away (well probably not porn). But like local businesses and such.

Capital one has a cool temp CC feature. It just generates a cc number on the spot. Not saying I support capital one but it is a dope ass feature.

Yeah, but it still shows on the bill. My wife wouldn't like the idea of "paying" for porn. Free is fine though. She is also a bit paranoid, so having my own card would make her uncomfortable.

Just throw it to paypal. But better yet, I'm not trying to teach you to be deceptive. If your wife isn't against free porn you should tell her what the implication of free porn means.

paypal still shows for me 🤷‍♀️

this is discord nitro

People actually pay for discord nitro? Here I thought most people were just memeing about it

I use discord a ton, paying an energy drink a month is worth being able to annoy everyone with emojis of my cat lol

I am one of the few that actually liked the nitro basic change, because I use emojis and the upload limit to send videos, I hardly use anything else.

Paying for the $10 nitro is still dumb though

I’d pay if there was a more discrete way of doing it

Basically why strip clubs are still in business.

Those interested: Erika Lust is a fun site. It has more ethical porn that you don't have to wade through weird crap for. Well worth it IMHO

I would also recommend, x confessions is fun. but you can also find it free online fyi

Erika Lust

I get turned off by high production values like that, it's like jacking off at someone's workplace.

I have a hard time keeping it off when it involves the profit motive

Everybody talking about free vs paid but nobody linking to the good ones of either...

games or vids?

::: spoiler Game another chance, free on itch io :::

::: spoiler Video candylove :::

I feel like this is implying that there's just "free porn" out there "somewhere" on the internet

lol yeah, what’s next? Are benevolent pixies going to distribute it throughout the forest too?

I'm really shocked at how many people (apparently) shell out for onlyfans, subscriptions and such.

I swear, I'm the only sane one, not the only insane one.

I don't pay because I don't consume prn at all!

Well. More porn for the rest of us.

Oh, crumb! I've gotten here way too late to make a joke about it not being a zero cum game. Ah, well. Next time!

Thankful for not having a lot of money, meaning such a expense would be negligible?

God makes you that?

His plan is to vicariously enjoy pornography through us, as an omniscient entity, he cannot otherwise enjoy sex on a guttural level like we can.

And of course, the vast majority of humans would not enjoy a statically significant amount of sexual if it weren't for pornography, so that's why he intervenes to make you seek out varied and rare porn.

This is basically the only reason why earth isn't just rocks floating in space.

Somewhat of a dumb take. There's nothing free on the internet. So you either pay for it directly or by giving away your data or participating in some form of scheme.

Also imagine paying a creator of the media that you consume and not a platform which scams an agency which scams the creator.

How horrible...

Honestly people are fucking weird. What is wrong with actually supporting the creator?

true by selling your data and stuff