Who would win?

Herbal Gamer@sh.itjust.works to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world – 1040 points –
130

Trick question. Police officers aren't trained.

The dogs probably have better training.

I refuse to belive the dogs are willing and knowing participants in this opression of the working class. they are clearly brainwashed

Takes three years to become one in Finland

Yeah, but that doesn't have anything to do with this thread... Your reply is the same as if someone posted a joke about obesity in the US and you commented about the obesity percentage in Finland. See how that makes absolutely no sense and is really weird? It's even more weird that you've somehow not understood how weird it is.

I get what you're saying, but they are trained. Trained to be bullies, to never report another officer no matter the horrible things they do, and that there's no consequences for their illegal actions.

Good cops get harassed, bullied, and even assaulted until they quit, bad cops are emboldened and become worse...

Yes. The fuck. They are

It's the training specifically that's a huge part of the problem.

Was this about the cop who went full schizo, did two barrel rolls and magdumped the back of his police car?

No. This is about the new movie by M. Night Shamalan - "Deez Nuts" it's about killer nuts trying to takeover a small Midwestern town. Apparently his kid developed nut allergies and it was his inspiration to produce this film.

The thing about that cop and the acorn is crazy tho yo.

It took me way too long to figure out what you meant. I'm like... butt allergies, what!? :-P

Butt allergies are the worst. I changed it to nut allergies to make my statement more factually correct. Don't want to start any rumors about M. Night Shamalan's kid having butt allergies.

And the second cop pops in no idea why there's shooting or from where, so she also starts emptying her mag into whatever she sees

To be fair to her, his actions were so bizarre she said she assumed he must have been hit because he was rolling around in the middle of the street while shouting "I've been hit."

accorns are brown... I'm sure it had a gun

Fine. Take my arrow. My last one for the day by the way. But you earned it. Bravo.

Some context regarding this meme. The police officer is a war veteran, who probably has massive PTSD and reacted accordingly.

Now why the hell would the police service hire a guy who is clearly unfit for service is a major American moment.

Do you have any evidence of the "war veteran" part of this, or literally anything to indicate that he has PTSD besides your own assertion that he "probably" has it? The only thing I can find is that he was in Afghanistan but never saw any combat. Are there things in Afghanistan that could cause PTSD? Sure. Is there any evidence that he has PTSD? Not that I've seen.

You know who probably does have massive PTSD? The cuffed guy in the back that was almost executed by two cops because one of them was so effing stupid that he thought he'd been shot by an acorn. He did not "react accordingly." He reacted like a trigger-happy moron. The only useful part of this is that he's resigned.

The talibans Asymetrical warfare and the resulting Paranoya itself can give PTSD

If you spend years always expecting an ambush, always being told to expect an ambush, you will see an ambush everywhere. Even if you never were actually ambushed.

Not that i'm defending him, but asymetrical warfare can and will fuck you up.

The Taliban's methods of warfare, in and of themselves, don't even meet criterion A for a PTSD diagnosis. The man wouldn't necessarily have to be in combat to meet that, but it's a lot more likely if he did (which, by all evidence I've seen, he didn't).

Being paranoid is not PTSD.

Which diagnostic standard are you using? None of the ones I have use letters.

I tend to diagnose with better tests than a physician's desk reference, but you do you.

Apparently whatever you're using doesn't have letters in it, so I assume it also doesn't have words, since those tend to be made of letters. I'm fine with this. You can do whatever the voices and crystals are telling you.

The Americanโ€™s asymmetrical warfare and the resulting paranoia itself can give you PTSD.

If you spend years always expecting a drone bombing your wedding, always being told to expect a drone bombing your wedding, you will see a drone bombing your wedding everywhere.

Even if your wedding never were actually drone bombed.

Not that i'm defending him but asymmetrical warfare can and will fuck you up.

And my question is, why should I give respect to someone who is violating rights of individuals domesticly as a police officer, and has likley committed war crimes and rights violations abrod, or atleast aided and abeded said war crimes. I only see this as more meme worthy. I understand PTSD is no joke, but at some point, the position of power and betrayal of your class removes the sympathy I would otherwise have for you

Sorry if my message didn't convey this.

I didn't ask for sympathy for anyone on this. It's more towards the process is absolutely fucking broken. It was obvious that something like that can happen to any person with more than 2 brain cells. And yet, the decisions we were made to put a person in a situation where he was bound to fail.

PTSD is not their fault, but it is their responsibility to deal with and they should not be employed in a position where that condition could engager the general public. Like it did. If I'm allergic to peanuts, I shouldn't be hired in a place that processes them. And even in that example, I'm only putting myself at risk.

Speculation, but having seen similarly hypervigilent and jumpy people get hired locally, they were hired for office duty, promote to field work and that's where they fucked up. But it's just three dudes I've seen that happen to, I wouldn't draw industry wide conclusions from that.

  • man hears a noise.
  • he's hit (only in his imagination).
  • rolls like movie characters.
  • shoots to his own car.
  • handcuffed victim ends unhurt.

Yes. Trained.

LOL I saw the video again. Both cops shoot to nothing lol. They are not even aiming.

Fortunately for the victim, they suck at trying to shoot a still target. Why gringos allow that kind of people to be police is beyond me.

The only thing that can justify the woman police, is that she only sees her mate rolling like madman and shooting to the car. It's fair to assume that there's a threat, if her mate is mentally stable and trained. Which apparently is no a true premise.

Trained to murder innocent people, apparently. Heโ€™s lucky he didnโ€™t. Not like heโ€™d face consequences if he did anyways.

sounds like they're trained to lie that they've been shot as an excuse to fire indiscriminately, actually...

Yes. Trained.

The type of pathetic response by this cop is a direct result of their "everything is a threat and you need to shoot first in all circumstances".

Literally how they are trained.

A corn.

Racist.

[kernel panic]

I don't get it - b/c it's yellow?

Racist against acorns. Calling them corn. Racist.

No way - that's not why I am racist (unlike this that is hella racist-er-est).

But okay, just solely for you, b/c the thought of your Eldritchian username coming after me haunts my dreams I wanted to be nice, here is an updated version:

It's a...

Is this a fucking joke to you?

Acorns are the only thing standing between us and the criminal element.

It's not the acorns that are the problem, dude. It's the fucking squirrels. They've been stashing them away... waiting for the right time.

You think the acorn that hit the cop just fell from a tree? Don't be naive! There a was a squirrel behind the grassy knoll that launched it at the cop.

Squirrels are the criminal element. I know because I have both squirrels and oak trees in my back yard. Thankfully, the acorns have a K-9 unit that keeps the squirrels in check.

By the way...this actually happened. A cop lost his shit and screamed "SHOTS FIRED!" when an acorn fell near him. He started shooting all over the place in a suberb which caused another cop nearby to also start shooting at nothing.

Why do we train our cops to be so terrified of everything?

The ones that freak out over an acorn are cheaper and easier to brainwash.

Yeah, the kind of people that believed all of that bullshit about WMDs and Iraq, or the kind of people that thought "reefer madness" was real.

I think it might be hiring. I've got a relative who was too paranoid and antsy for the post office, but he's fit right in as a sheriff's deputy. I'm glad he found a place to belong.

Does the sheriff's office drop off recruiting pamphlets in the post office?

Like "Going postal? Apply to become a police officer today!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tuzQrbio2Qw

Here's an extremely depressing answer. The mentality is broken

by the way, cops need guns. They need to be trained better, but they still need guns.

Not assault rifles of grenade launchers full of tear gas, but just regular pistols

Someone loop me in with the acorn, seen it in a few memes now :/

A cop had someone handcuffed in the backseat, an acorn landed on the car, the cop panicked thought he'd been shot and emptied his gun at his car, somehow not killing the person handcuffed in back.

His partner also dumped a clip into the vehicle. The officer that got spooked by the acorn literally did not realize he had not been shot until he go to the hospital...

Tbh it was kinda fascinating to see how strong the tricks your mind can play on you can be. The guy was thoroughly convinced he'd been shot. He was all "my legs are numb" and shit. His brain told him he'd been hit by a bullet, and his body believed it without the force or the sound of a gunshot.

It's better, not only did his partner also open fire neither of them even hit the guy, who was huddling in place, trying not to get executed by clowns.

It's hilarious that even amateurs with practically no experience are more responsible with firearms than US cops.

Because they face consequences for their actions.

Never forget that a second officer opened fire due to the first dumbass shooting at an acorn.

And despite targeting a handcuffed person confined in the back seat of a car, they missed every shot.

Acorns take between 5 and 24 months to mature.

Police training is around 21 weeks (5.25 months)

Coincidence? ๐Ÿค”

A trained police officer

A pig with a gun

FTFY

Hey, lets be fair to the pigs... they would cause less deaths, and be far less scared of the acorn...

As I am typing this I think we should replace all Cops in the US with Pigs that have badges and Guns

Maybe a TRAINED police officer would. Not whatever they have in the US.

We trained them poorly, on purpose, as a prank on all brown people. And socialists. And queers. And the unhoused. And drug enjoyers. And everyone that doesn't do what the state says at all times.

Your cops are all bastards as well. Every single one of them. Sure our cops are more obnoxious but yours are just as evil.

If the context is "see who can go the longest without being corrupt or abusing their position of power", the acorn.

Acorn uses decoy black guy already detained in police car.

It's super effective!

acorn cuz a cop couldn't hit an acorn once even if they went through their entire presinct's ammo supply

If itโ€™s an American Police Officer theyโ€™d call in an airstrike from dispatch. Checkmate.

When a tree teabags you you should definitely unload on it.

Def not the guy in the back seat. Speaking of that what did he have? Autism? Gay? Black? Just plain old didn't fit in with the norm?