What's the funniest mishearing of song lyrics you've had?

cheese_greater@lemmy.world to Ask Lemmy@lemmy.world – 103 points –

Tears in Heaven

[chorus] I must be strong == I must destroy

Lets hear em

132

Not me personally, but I worked with a guy that always thought Secret Agent Man was Secret Asian Man.

No joke. Many years ago we went to a biker bar and it happened to be a karaoke night. Asian guy sings Secret "Asian" man and we lost our shit.

I've since learned it is a fairly common one. But we got a lot of laughs out of it with him. Just out of the blue when he'd come to his desk someone would break out singing it.

Honestly I think the singer threw in at least one secret asian man, and Secret aging man.

1 more...

Pearl Jam; Daughter

Center of a Rhododendron = Center of he own attention.

Pearl Jam feels like cheating.

Here's the classic Yellow Ledbetter

Yellow Ledbetter doesn't count. It's mumbled in recordings because the lyrics change over time to adapt to whatever conflict we're currently wasting life on.

I still don't know the full lyrics of even flow. Every time I hear it fucks with my head and I forget the words.

Always loved Eddie making fun of Mike for thinking the Kiss lyrics were, “I wanna rock n roll all night, and part of every day.”

Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree by Brenda Lee

When I was a kid, I swear the lyrics sounded like "later we'll have some fucking pie", but it's "later we'll have some pumpkin pie".

Oh I am absolutely teaching that one to my nephew before next holiday season…

How old?

Can't say I remember. It's one of those songs that has been played every year for ages upon ages. Maybe around 10 or something.

No dogs orgasm in the classroom

Another Brick in the Wall (part 2)

"all in all it's just a" - "hol ihn hol ihn unters Dach"

"Fetch him under the roof". And it has a nice story to go along with it that the sound engineer mixing the song was German, heard that line and then committed suicide under the roof of the studio because he was reminded of the abuse he suffered as a child in an orphanage.

Total fabrication by the German documentary show "Quarks & Co" to demonstrate how one can be manipulated to hear stuff that isn't there. To this day I can't not hear it when listening to the song.

I know I'm not the only one but I always thought the line was "dirty deeds and the Thunder Chief". Still think Thunder Chief is a cool name.

Same band, I thought the line was "let loose, vamanoose" like a funny way of saying vamonos - or "lets go".

I also used to say stuff like that as a kid! I think I said, "thunder Jeep." My dad thought it was hilarious. But he did show me that the album included the lyrics. I’ll still do it my way if the song comes on when he visits.

"'Scuse me while I kiss this guy..."

Fun fact: there is a book called that, that is a collection of these.

Blinded By the Light

Roll up like a douche Rev up like a deuce

If you want a big list of these check out https://www.kissthisguy.com/

Here's one from there

Like a virgin touched for the thirty-first time. Artist: Madonna Song: Like a Virgin Real Lyric: Like a virgin touched for the very first time.

Taylor Swift - Blank Space

"Got a long list of ex lovers"

As

"Gotta love those Starbucks lovers"

I thought it was supposed to be a self aware "white girl" joke.

Lmao I also heard it as that and was so confused at wtf it was supposed to actually be

I remember the subtitles for Smash Mouth - Walking on the Sun said "It's like kitty fat, it retracts before impact" which was nuts, I had the CD, and it was "any fad". They didn't use to vet subtitles on MTV. There were orders, but that's all I remember.

José Feliciano - Feliz Navidad.

Sounds like he is saying 'release mum and dad.' interlace with him singing 'I want to wish you a merry christmas'

I was in stitches at the dinner table when I heard it. Trying to tell my brother while crying and hyperventilating with laughter made it even better.

I hear this song in my head every time I see a "for lease" sign...

For lease navidad.

Who, from time to time, has not been revved up like a douche?

I was like last month old when a cover performance finally suggested it could be "deuce", like the coupe, instead. I knew "douche" was wrong, but I never had the presence to ask.

I still don't know whether that's right.

Deuce is correct. The tune that everyone knows is actually a cover by Manfred Mann of Springsteen’s original (yes, Bruce Springsteen). The lyrics were tweaked a bit. Springsteen’s lyrics are “Blinded by the light, cut loose like a deuce, another runner in the night”.

I used to work with this guy who swore the lyrics to Beast of Burden by The Rolling Stones were, “Don’t wanna be, your pizza’s burnin’”.

I will never accept that it's not. I would say that the correct lyrics are "pizza burner", though.

Head Automatica - I Shot William H. Macy

What my friends and I heard when the album dropped: "Yeah, yeah... I put a sausage in your little hand!"

What the actual line says: "Yeah yeah, I'll put assassins in your little head."

Although my all-time favorite is and will forever be:

"Excuse me, while I kiss this guy" - Jimmy Hendrix

Love Head Automatica (and Glassjaw!)

I’mma pull up I Shot William H. Macy now.

"Blank Space" by Taylor Swift

Got a long list of ex-lovers

"Lonely Starbucks lovers"

It's in our nature to destroy ourselves

It's in our nature to kill ourselves

It's in our nature to kill each other

It's in our nature to kill, kill, kill

That's the actual lyrics of Blood Brothers from Papa Roach, some people hear "Human Nature" instead of our nature, which is still the same meaning. However I once read someone misshearing of that lyrics and I can never unheard it, this is what I hear now (and so will you if you read):

Send the ninjas to destroy ourselves

Send the ninjas to kill ourselves

Send the ninjas to kill each other

Send the ninjas to kill, kill, kill

Back nearly 20 years ago Disney California Adventure (Anaheim, Cali) had this interactive exhibit where you did various things in line with the Disney animated kids movies. One was playing the Seven Dwarfs "Heigh ho, heigh ho, it's off to work we go..."

In a little alcove in front of a group of friends was another group of cute mid-teen little Latino girls. They were dressed somewhat provocatively for the average Disney guest and all were wearing bold makeup, (not judging, but they stood out). The typical Spanish accent was prevalent with the silent "h". Their innocent rendition as they sang along was hilarious. Happy as they could be they were singing, "I hoe, I hoe, it's off to work we go..."

If you like peeing on koalas and getting caught in the rain

Had a friend who's little bro thought "Liberate my madness" from Liberate by Slipknot was "Never eat bananas".

She's got electric boobs... Something something... B-b-b-benny and the jetsssss

Its funny, I always felt Benny was more crocodiley than Crocodile Rock. Like that snappy piano riff at the beginning sounds like the musical/thematic equivalent of a crocodile with its mouth wide open snapping shut

The bridge to The Four Horsemen by Metallica

🎶Time has taken a stool on you!🎶

Hemorrhage by Fuel

Leave love bleeding in my hands, in my hands again We all livin' in my pants, in my pants oh yeah

The Toadies "Possum Kingdom"

I'm not gonna lie
I'll not be a gentleman
Behind the boathouse
I'll show you my dark secret dashiki

Heads Will Roll - Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Casserole, casserole, on the wall.

Brimful of Asha by Cornershop.

The title and the lyric are both "brimful of Asha", which has a double meaning. In the singer's native language 'Asha' means hope, and is also the name of an iconic Bollywood singer/dancer.

What I heard was "grim poodle basher". Obviously it wasn't right, but I couldn't figure out the actual words just by listening harder.

Twenty years ago, Buffalo, NY. The Fat of the Land by Prodigy was still huge. A dancer in a strip club thought "Smack my Bitch Up" was "Snap my Picture". True story.

I wish I didn't have to pee be so bad.

-blink 182 - Wendy Clear

and the most prominent

I wore cologne walk alone to get the feeling right

-blink 182 - What's My Age Again.

Though sometimes when Tom and Mark performs live, they butchered some lines for some dumb jokes lol.

Simon & Garfunkel; Mrs. Robinson

Jesus loves you more than you will know

=

She’s a slut more than you could know—whoa, who, whoa!

From high school until two or three weeks ago, I thought the lyrics for Limp Bizkit's "Just Like This" were concerned about John Goodman's weight.

"...and we make sure that John Goodman beats fat"

The song randomly popped into my head a few weeks ago, and I was like "wait, that can't be right". So I looked up the correct lyrics which are "And we made sure that John kept them beats phat"

I just breathed a sigh of relief that John Goodman is not the subject of a Limp Bizkit song…

Acting funny, but I don't know why... 'Scuse me while I kiss the sky kiss this guy

Hendrix. Purple Haze

There's gotta be, like a separate... Thing... For when the lyrics you misheard make more sense than what the lyrics actually are.

Golden Earring - Radar Love

We've got a thing that's called red hot love

We've got a wave in the air

Red hot love

In my defense, I was hearing this over sometimes-fuzzy analog radio rather than off a tape or CD where the track title might clue me in. Less defensible: not noticing the other words that make more sense when talking about radar.

I always thought it was redeye love, in the same context as a redeye flight.

There this French fold band, Skáld that usually sings in Old Norse language. In the song Hross, the first line of the chorus is "Hverir eru þeir tveir?". The way they sing those first two words sounds like "Fevereiro", which is the Portuguese (my native language) word for February.

Working with guys who's 1st language isn't English singing "Take me to Monkey Town", instead of "Take me to Funky Town."

I had a friend in grade school that argued with me about the lyrics to Kenny Rodgers The Gambler. He was loudly and angrily certain the song said "You gotta know how to hold 'em" and would NOT hear my suggestion that it is really "when to hold 'em".

The next day he quietly told me I was right.

Suffragette City:

"The smell of fat chicks just puts a smile on my face"

Call Me Maybe / Carly Rae Jepsen

You took your time with the call
I took no time with the fall
You gave me nothing at all
But still, you're in my way
I beg and borrow and steal
Swear to Satan it's real At first sight, and it's real
I didn't know I would feel it
But it's in my way

Yep. Knew it was wrong, but that's what I heard. TIL what the actual lyrics are.

Another Carly Rae one:

Fake Mona Lisa

He was born in Vegas

The way she sings it, it sounds like

It's morning fa**ots

Billy Joel - She's Always a Woman

She hides like a child but she's always a woman to me == a weasel-woman to me

Every girl's crazy about a sharp dressed man= every girl's crazy about his shotgun hair.

My aunt once told me when one of my cousins was like 4 or 5, he was singing along to Band on the Run, but saying "Hand on the rug"

Killswitch Engage - My Curse

This is my curse

This is my purse

I was once listening to The Pillows' "I Think I Can" around a friend. Japanese band, lots of their songs are in English but you'd never know through the singer's heavy Japanese accent. He repeats the titular line a lot in the song and my friend thought he was singing "I lick my cunt."

That was 15 years ago and it's still all I hear when I listen to the song.

One of the earliest websites I remember was like scuse me while I miss this guy dot com and it was people sharing what you're looking for. Check the way back machine

At first I thought Post Malone was saying “swallow my knife” and not “spoil my night.”

"living like a lover with a red iPhone" - Pour some sugar on me, 1987

My sister-in-law thought the chorus of Metallica's Battery was "backdoor raid". Now I can't unhear it.

I also thought in Live and Let Die Paul sang, "give an Alabama yell" instead of "give the other feller hell."

My wife’s childhood:

“My anus can’t take it I’m addicted to love”.

Robert Palmer.

Mine is when I sing, and I can’t remember what I say, but something like “kissing your neck, back, n’dem titties” to Labrinths Still Don’t Know My Name. Although I’m still fairly certain those lyrics to be correct 👍

I was driving one day, in the early 1990s, singing along with Elton John, "love I feel it in my hands, I can tell by the things I could do with another man.." as I had since I was a little kid, when I suddenly realized that probably wasn't what he was saying. It still sounds like that is what he is saying.

I see quite a lot of Elton John in these answers, maybe he just didn't enunciate.