You can make one change to the world/reality that makes people's lives more inconvenient or awkward. What do you change?
I'd make it so that liquid soap dispensers sounded like they were struggling to nut quietly each time you pressed down.
I'd make it so that liquid soap dispensers sounded like they were struggling to nut quietly each time you pressed down.
I quite like the (I think?) Jewish curse: "may your laundry never dry". That would suck wearing clothes that are always slightly damp.
Calm down Satan!
I know you jest, but the more you think about it, the nastier a curse it is. For example, your crack would always be itchy. You'd never be able to put your clothes away because mold would devour them. And so on.
You could never wear socks because your feet would get diseased.
Exactly. It would suck.
That's terrible, haha.
Every set of stairs has one step that is slightly taller than the rest
Don't bother with steps that are each different — making steps the wrong height/length is enough. If you ever walked up/down stairs that felt really weird it's probably because the builder ignored the international standards on that topic and built steps that are a couple centimeters off.
That was actually a thing in castle design. There'd be one step just high enough compared to the others that an assassin chasing the king would hopefully stumble on it, and the king could turn around and stab the assassin.
I'm sure you mean all the heights are a little different, but I'm envisioning where every step has to be taller than the previous one and the shenanery that would happen to make long stair cases navigable. Start with teeny tiny steps to end with uncomfortably large ones.
You monster.
You know how you sometimes get a pebble stuck under your shoe and walking just feels weird until you remove it?
That, but there’s no actual pebble.
I already have that curse tyvm
So everyone has corns?
You lose the ability to differentiate between a fart and a poo.
Crohns and colitis say hi
Old. You're describing what it's like to get old.
Everytime you open a door it moans with pleasure.
This answer is brought to you by the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation
Marvin hates it.
Thematic w/ mine, I like it!
Bell ringing sound every time you get an erection
That could be deafening in certain public spaces.
This one's my favorite
Jimmy Valner
No matter how hard one squeezes, there’s ALWAYS three or four drops of pee leftover, poised to strike after one finishes their business.
IT WAS YOU!
^This person right here officer.
Make it so that when you arrive home you're never allowed to put your keys in the same place more than once.
Forgot something in the car and have to go back out? Time to find a new spot...
Oh hey, it's like ADHD for everyone!
Surviving adhd'er does a "spot" count if my keys are always attached to my pants?
As the rulemaker I'd say that's fair game, but you'd have to keep them strapped to your pajamas otherwise that's when you'd need to find a spot.
Did this already happen? Because I never put them in the same place and am constantly rushing to find them lol.
I think my wife has this curse already.
wind makes everyone ticklish
That tornado sure sounds fun...
The good thing I can say is that Bob died laughing.
The bad thing is that if he hadn't been laughing so much he might not have been standing there laughing when the wind threw a telephone pole at him.
All doors you try to open actually open the opposite direction
What's new here?
Pocket doors would be a euclidean nightmare
Eyelids become translucent. In other words, you can still see anything and everything when your eyes are closed.
You own a lot of stock in eyemasks?
I own The Eyemask Emporium.
I liked their eye masks so much, I bought the place
This would be awesome! No need for underwater goggles anymore! I could shut my eyes against strong winds and still see!
You would still see your eyelashes though. Also, sleeping would be a bit more challenging.
You must greet everyone you meet with a handshake and ten seconds of uninterrupted eye contact. Forced smiles and a serious talk about how you really are doing are also mandatory.
Pretty awkward if you ask me :)
Neurodivergent hell.
USB-C now has the same connector directionality problem that USB-A does
Id like to think it would still work both ways mechanically, but would be one sided electrically.
That's way worse.
Depending on the device side connector and how the PCB is designed it actually can be orientation-dependent.
Funnily enough, there are cases where that occurs. The Zed Mini is a great example, where the orientation of the cable affects it's ability to fully utilise USB bandwidth. I don't recall the reason off the top of my head, but I have shared stories with a number of people in the computer vision sector who have torn their hair out over those cameras only to discover that they don't work properly when the cable is "upside down"
switch locations of penis and anus
Stand back girls I know how to twerk it
Good lord.
Everyone is ever so slightly telepathic, functionally making a web of felt emotions with no thoughts connecting them so what you feel from this is basically a summary of the people in the area around you.
Example: Everyone could be focused at work, nothing major going on, until someone thinks about their significant other and all of a sudden there's a tiny bit of horny thrown in the mix, everyone knows its there, and no one knows who put it there.
Women are already scarce in IT.
Mirror every object. You don't realize how many things are designed with a right-handed assumption unless you aren't right handed. Also, most people can't read well anymore because it's all backwards
I’d say reading is back to normal after 2-3 days tops for most people.
I used to tutor math at a company that insisted that we write upside down so the page was always facing the students. It really did only take like 3 days for it to feel natural.
Any time you use something powered by a fossil fuel your pinkies ache about as much as a lightly stubbed toe.
This would really light a fire under corporation's asses to adapt for climate change...
You never hear someone the first couple times they try to pay you a compliment
Remove the ability to remember if you turned something off.
Joke's on you, I already can't.
You monster!
Like OCD for everyone!
Sneezing is excessively messy.
I already feel like I live this reality
From now on, you get static shocked every time you touch anything.
life in winter anyways
Someone told me once that slapping something metal and grounded will discharge the energy and not hurt as much (you're expecting the impact of hitting it, so the electric shock comes with it; this is in contrast to gently brushing something and getting shocked unexpectedly). I've found it useful.
such a good trick. Used it for years.
Welcome to Antarctica, friend! The buildings at Scott base are all fitted out with handrails that the occupants use to ground themselves periodically while walking around, because static buildup is such a serious issue down there.
Friction stops working.
This is apocalyptic-level inconvenience
Some men just want to see the world burn
This would actually kill a significant number of people, especially if they didn't know it was about to happen.
Pretty sure it would kill everyone and ultimately destroy the universe or at least the universe's ability to sustain life.
After all, at some level, friction is the only thing that keeps you rooted onto the planet.
Sure there's gravity but there's that's only pulling you down, friction is what keeps you and the wind and the tree and the houses and everything else from sliding sideways as the Earth rotates underneath them.
The instant that rule went into effect, the Earth would become a 15,000 mph meat grinder under our feet.
Telepathy for everyone. Instant chaos.
How about telepathy for half the people. That's even more chaotic.
Nice.
Everyone's butt hole could be anywhere on their body. Everyone needs a different kind of toilet to properly position themselves. Everyone starts aligning themselves as friends based on the location of their butt hole. "Oh sorry I can't stay too long. My butthole is in my armpit."
You sir, are worse than satan.
It always takes three rotations to plug in a USB cable.
OP said you have to change something, not describe the world like it is
Burn in hell you heretical asshole. Hehe
Even for USBC?
Now it is lol
Both of these are my moms ideas.
First your cars never start.
Or the other option
We no longer have cell phones, we have to go back to land lines.
The second really isn’t much of an issue after an adjustment period. Might even improve our lives by killing off social media
Unless it just means that we can't make phone calls on our smart phones - in which case it doesn't change much.
One of your socks is always wet
I'll just keep a sock in my pocket so that one can be wet instead of one on my foot
"Is that a wet sock in your pocket or are you incontinent?"
Both, actually!
evil
I'd make every scissor a little bit loose so whatever it's cutting turns sideways and gets stuck near the end.
This is what being left handed is like.
As a kid, I didn't understand why left-handed scissors were a thing. Then I had to cut a wide strip of fabric with my non-dominant left hand.
It was an experience.
It's impossible to determine the charge level of phone batteries. It's now up to you to keep track or your activities and estimate when you'll need to charge, otherwise it will just turn off on its own when the battery runs out.
I think I'd just charge it constantly at every chance.
I think the biggest outcome of that would be phone batteries getting much bigger.
Garunteed way to fasttrack the invention of true wireless power delivery.
everytime you are going to sit, you have to declare it out loud
Whenever you say anything to anyone the other person always knows exactly what your thinking is behind what you are saying.
That would make it nearly impossible to lie, cheat or deceive others, even for the smallest thing.
So that way when your girlfriend asks you if you would still love her if she were a worm, even though you would say, "Of course my love!" She would know you actually mean "what the fuck are you talking about?" And you would know she actually meant "my emotional batteries are running dry and I want you to recharge them"
That sounds better
Any time you try to get tape off a roll, it rips halfway through and turns into a mess. The same with toilet paper
Men die after they fertilize women just like mantises
Because they get eaten (just like mantids)?
This is probably not so bad an idea to some people
Hey, no more taxes, I'm in.
Die physically, or mentally?
No matter how much you wipe there is still poop
I call that a NEW. Never ending wipe.
Psyllium husk is real and saves soooo much time. 1tbsp a day and tour life will change for the better.
bidet gang
Hot beverages are always either too hot or too cold.
Diabolical.
Brain now naturally resists sleep for as long as possible, so everyone stays awake for two or three days before crashing uncontrollably.
At random times whenever you are traveling in any vehicle, you simultaneously feel a sneeze coming on, and yet have to pee a little bit too. However, you can neither sneeze nor pee until you are out of the vehicle.
Inconvenient on a bus/train or as a passenger, deadly if you're driving. Bicycles are right out, I suppose.
This'd likely a bit more than inconvenience, but honestly, to the degree that it would be more than that (or more accurately to the people to whom it would be more than that), I just don't give a shit.
Make it literally impossible to knowingly lie. Full stop.
Jim Carrey style. I like it!
Make flashlights scream when you turn them on.
Have every squeeze of tooth paste contain an air bubble that spews a bit on you.
Have a single dead pixel in the center of every display.
Make fridge doors not close automatically.
Make cars moan, whether ICE or electric.
Whose fridge door closes automatically? Is this another thing Usonians are unfortunately ignorant of?
Everyone has to skip instead of walking.
For whatever reason, your comment made me think of that scene in Big, where Tom Hanks and Robert Loggia dance on the floor piano.
Not sure why. Probably the thought of people doing something moderately wacky and fun in everyday life.
I would give everyone noclip mode.
Convenient because you can fly anywhere and through walls. People's commutes would be so much shorter! You could visit any country you wanted without even needing planes. Everyone would experience an unprecedented level of freedom.
Inconvenient because of the messy implications of getting stuck in walls if you turned it off at the wrong time. Also people would probably just be able to take anything they wanted without repurcussions so the world might devolve into chaos. You wouldn't really be able to jail anyone. Security and privacy would be hard to come by.
For true inconvenience: only the person has no-clip. Not material objects. If you want to No-clip through a wall you need to be naked.
Perfect 🤌🏻
This is one of the most creative ones so far
All mouthwash turns to orange juice after brushing your teeth
Thumb and ring finger change places. Opposable ring fingers.
There’s always just a little bit left while wiping. You can never get it completely clean.
IBS be like
Not a problem with my bidet!
Sex is painful for the man too
Too?
Joke's on you, I'm into that
um, it's not supposed to hurt for either 😳
Sounds like they need to either introduce a 55 gallon drum of lube into their sex life or they need to make it a rule that they have to spend 20 minutes doing foreplay before sex.
I wish for water to no longer be a bipolar molecule
There are medications for bipolar.
They said slightly inconvenient, not change the fundamental molecule they makes life possible.
What sort of effects would that have? I imagine stuff like surface tension wouldn't exist anymore.
Oh also microwaves wouldn't work.
ice would sink. imagine the chaos it would cause at the poles.
Clothing sleeves, pant (trouser) legs, underwear garments, socks, etc. all have one side slightly longer than the other
Joke's on you, I'm asymmetrical
Make everyone listen to 10 hours of cow sounds on repeat.
change the date system to day month year
This would be an improvement.
Year month day, take it or leave it
It already is, over here in the UK.
It already is everywhere except yeehawistan.
Every time you drink anything or are near running wather youl get splashed in the groin and would look like you peed yourself.
Everyone's got a drinking problem :(
Everyone has a (changing) tattoo on their forehead telling how many deaths are caused by their overconsumption of the planet's resources.
All environmental externalities are included in all prices. Also currency is manipulated to prevent overconsuming the planet's resources
Whether or not there is an object acting upon them, earbuds sporadically jerk out of your ears every few minutes.
You are physically unable to litter.
Everyone who eats at fast food restaurants gets diarrhea for 3 days
What would you change about it though?
On a funny note I'd make all fast food react like Chipotle.
On a serious note it would be the chipotle from South Park where you'd be shitting blood.
Is there really not a single answer saying "I would rather not make everybody's lives more inconvenient just because I could"?
You this fun with every silly hypothetical?