Is it wrong for 25M to date 19F?

MTK@lemmy.world to Asklemmy@lemmy.ml – 142 points –

So I met this girl by chance and we really hit it off, once I learned of her age I decided to just be friends as I think that 19 to 25 is an age were we mature a lot and I remember myself as a 19yo and I was not mature enough to be a good partner and to be good to myself.

I talked to a female friend of mine and she said that I'm over thinking it and that I should ask her out and be open minded, and so I did and we are going on a date soon.

The thing is, she seems really mature but I can't put aside the age gap.

Am I over thinking it? Should I really just take it slow and just be vigilant about the situation and notice if this isn't healthy for me or her?

Or should I let her down easy and continue as friends?

Update: We went on a date and it was great, I read all of the comments and there were some really good advices that I took to heart. I will take things slow and try to be as aware of the situation as possible. I hope it will go well :)

Thank you everyone!

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The age gap might make a relationship difficult, but it's not wrong. Just make sure you have clear open communication and understand each other's expectations. You're both adults.

Thank you!

As for what other people may think, the "half your age + 7" rule is pretty consistent

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Half-age-plus-seven-relationship-rule.svg

But yea you guys will know the situation best. Communicate well :)

The only problem with the chart is that it doesn't account for stuff like independence. If a 19 year old has a stable job and is living on their own I would be a lot more forgiving than if the 19 year old was still in college and living with their parent.

Also a 19 year old who never dated vs. a 19 year old who dated a few different people already.

Relationship experience is important to help us be safe in our relationships…

Check to see if there is a power differential here.

Are you an established adult with a Real Job and a nice apartment while she is struggling to figure out how to get out from under the thumb of her controlling family? Or is she happily making her own way in the world as a small farmer or boat salesperson or something while you have been futzing around painting skateboards and playing in a minor punk band?

Older people dating younger people can be wrong because it is easy for the older person to have too much power in the relationship. If you have something she really wants or needs that you can provide or withdraw at will or as a condition of the relationship, you should not date.

Wtfh why do you pretend like people can't be nice if there is a power differential? A couple with a moderate power differential like you describe is only a problem if the powerful one decides to be a dick about it; it's literally fine as long as they are a nice person and can commit to not taking advantage.

Yeah, probably more of a 'proceed with caution' rather than a flat no.

Plus in any relationship there are wants and needs being met by the relationship that would be withdrawn if the relationship were to end. Mutual benefit is why you get into a long term relationship in the first place.

If you have something she really wants or needs that you can provide or withdraw at will or as a condition of the relationship, you should not date.

There's a sex joke in there, but the conversation it to mature for me to make it.

I guess there is some of that but I think that if I take it slow and let her be her own person outside the relationship (as we all should) it should be less of an issue

The fact that you are talking about "letting"her be her own person outside the relationship sort of implies that she might not have already figured out how to do that on her own.

People are right to wave red flags here, but are also right that it isn't necessarily the age that is the potential problem.

Make sure she knows how to be an independent adult with her own career, hobbies, and motivations, or you get into unpredictable territory.

From a viewpoint of a 40+ you are practically the same age.

While I agree it's hard to deny they are really not that far apart in terms of age, 19 year olds and 25 year olds are worlds apart. Disclaimer: American, can't speak for other cultures

Yeah I'd really have a hard time dating someone who is likely still living with their parents if I'd been on my own a year or two. I wouldn't consider making the relationship serious until I knew they could stand on their own feet.

It really depends though, some people are just really mature at a young age. I know some teenagers who are unfortunately taking care of their parent(s) and siblings. Life is very different for different people.

I'm turning 31 this year, and my girlfriend is 25.

We've been together six years now. I didn't realize she was still 18 until the end of our first date, and she caught that I was visibly startled by it.

I owned up that I didnt realize and assumed from our interactions that she was at least 20-22 and she laughed and apologized, saying she thought I knew her age.

After going home and thinking about how well we hit it off, and how she found my concern amusing, I decided I was being silly and that if the age gap was a problem it would make itself evident.

Best decision ever. Nothing wrong with paying attention to those things, just keep open communication with each other 👍

I'll also note that I had skipped college and had been working, and was about to go back to school. She was about to start her second year in college.

There are multiple ways people can find themselves on the same path and there was some serendipity for sure.

To the point of many other people here, yes, over the next five years she is going to evolve more than you as a person. So just understand going that growing apart is more likely than if you were both in your 30's.

Nothing wrong with that, just a reality to acknowledge.

Did you ever get your degree, Mr Poopybutthole?

The thing is, she seems really mature

Every time I read this I cringe. Because most of the time this comes from someone that cant really judge that. You dont seem to know each other for a long time or have a deep connection.

Besides that I wish both of you the best and maybe it turns out as some of the positive stories in the other comments. Or not. Both are ok.

I suspect people often mistake 'chilled out' or 'doesn't enjoy partying much' as mature.

True but not in this case, I'm looking at it from a world-views and emotional understanding point of view.

Its true that I don't know her for long, she seems mature from my short time with her but I know it doesn't say much

I agree with your friend, I think that you're overthinking. As long as both are adults and willing, I don't see anything wrong.

Lack of maturity can be a problem in the long run but it's a problem that goes away over time, plus it is not some unsurmountable barrier.

I dated a 5 year younger woman in my twenties for 5 years and while the age gap itself wasn't an issue to us or anyone else, what turned out to be an issue, was that she changed quite dramatically during those 5 years and we ended up growing apart. That's a feature of a young age though, not the age difference.

This is the real issue. Date her and have a great time, but don't consider moving in together or getting married for years. I got married when we were both 18 and after a few years, she turned into a different person and ended up really hurting me. 0/10 would not do again.

I think this is the biggest risk. 19 year olds often change a lot before they’re ready to settle down. If OP is looking for a long term relationship it’s more risky.

USAian society has probably told you there is some kind of formula to calculate whether it's alright. Fuck that. Treat her like a human, not some input to a formula. Be decent, communicate, and if she's fine with it and likes you, that's all that matters. Society shouldn't come between you and another human.

That formula is French

I'm French and never heard about it from French people. It's always brought up by Americans.

Yeah, there's really nothing wrong with a 50 year old dating a 19 year old. Age is just a number. There's no power imbalance there or expectations. It's perfectly healthy for the 19 year old to get into a long term relationship where their partner is going to be 70 before they're 40.

Or, maybe, half your age + 7 is a good rule. It's pretty lenient.

At 18 we let people vote on the direction of the entire nation. We let them buy houses and go into debt for life. We let them die in war for their country. Most places in the world let them drink and get married. Of all of these rights, the absolute least of them is the right to fuck whichever other adult they choose. I cannot understand the utter insanity of thinking one is responsible enough to vote but not have sex. If you don’t think they’re responsible enough to have sex then they’re sure as shit not responsible enough to everything else.

18 year olds are adults. It’s time we stop infantilising them. People used to get married much younger than even that. If they want to fuck an older person, more power to them.

Yeah its not illegal for an 18 year old to date a 50 year old. You can still recognize that the 50 year old in this case is a creep.

No bank will give a home loan to an 18 year old that doesn't have income. They will happily give them a student loan and saddle them in debt for life though because the loan can't be discharged. That scenario is legal and is also rightfully criticized.

You say let them die in a war like thats a feature and something the teenager wants. Governments would conscript younger teens if they could get away with it.

2 more...
4 more...

According to the universal dating age formula, (25/2) + 7 = 19.5, so I think you're good. Anything less would be creepy.

The moral panic about age gaps for any relationship where both people are over eighteen is so ridiculous.

You're fine. Just date her in you want to.

I don't think it is, while age ia not THE determining factor it does point to a possible lack of maturaity, experience, etc

So for some 18yo it night be okay to date a 21+ while others might have a 16yo mindset and really should't date anyone.

you can't be 100% sure about a relationship until you try it. it might work out, it might not. age is not going to be an obvious problem upfront if she seems mature. you just have to accept that you're taking a risk.

This is a good take, and you seem like a decent person. I think after a couple dates, you would quickly know if she is as mature as she seems and if it feels like the relationship is unbalanced or not.

My wife and I are similar distances and met at a similar age. I couldn't stand most girls her age, or even my age. But she has always been an old soul, and was more mature than most women I would have met, and certainly more mature than I was back then.

Ffs date her and see what happens, you know find out what she’s like and all that..

Date the person not the number…

Also cuz I know the internet likes to be ridiculous with stuff don’t take the above statement and say some dumb shit like what if a 12 yr old was the number, this thread is about an 18 year old who is of legal age for the most part in most places

Your age, divided by 2, then add 7 = minimum age that most of society will deem okay.

For example:

25 ÷ 2 = 12.5 + 7 = 19.5

So the acceptable age for you to date that avoids the 'ick' is around 19 years old. Honestly it's not a big deal in the long run.

For me as long as your above 18 and it's consentual (ie. not forced, pressured, or groomed, etc), it's fine.

My wife is 7 years older than me. We met in college. I think I was 22. We've been married for 25 years.

So your wife was prowling the local colleges for guys at 29 years old? 🤔

Maybe she wasn't able to start collage sooner... There are many reasons for why s1 is at collage at 29.

I finished university in 10 years. I know a lot of people who did it in even more.

Not sure that a 25 year old is in a great position to judge the relative maturity of a 19 year old, but in general terms the only issue here is if you find it an issue. If you can't be comfortable in the relationship then it doesn't really work for you and you shouldn't force it.

That said, there's no harm in exploring the prospect over the course of a few dates... just don't commit yourself until you feel comfortable.

Why do people consider bigger age gaps a problem? Because there's often a difference in maturity and experience that makes it harder to communicate, have the same goals and often puts the younger party at risk of being taken advantage of.

So if you think that the thing the age gap is a stand in for, a gap in maturity, doesn't apply, there's also no reason to get hung up on the number and mistake the map for the territory.

I think it's good that you're questioning yourself though and you should probably keep being a bit cautious about the situation and reevaluating yourself until you can be certain you two are on the same level.

There can be a power imbalance due to the younger one being less experienced and often having access to less resources.

You learn a lot dating in your late teens / 20 that allows you to avoid bad situations later in life.

But you can't say it's wrong with X years gap. Just that the potential for abuse is greater.

The experience gap at the low end is the big reason all this age stuff exists, no one really cares as much when you're 30 and dating someone over 40. The 18-22 range has huge experience gaps, most have never been independent before 18, many aren't truly independent until 22-24 due to college.

The exposure to different points of view and lifestyles that happens for most at this age is significant and it can cause real problems in a relationship. If one person has already done that journey of self discovery and settled into a career, and the other hasn't even started. That can lead to long term resentment or drifting apart as that discovery happens.

I’m 8 years older than my wife. We’ve been together over 11 years. When we first got together, she was 21 and I was 29. Now I’m 40 and she’s 32.

As long as you’re both consenting adults, there’s no power disparity, you have commonalities, and you’re both at the same stage in life, age is meaningless.

I'm not sure that we are at the same stage in life but we should be in about 1-2 years

When I was 25, I met a young woman who was also 19. I couldn't believe she was so young, because she seemed so mature. But it wasn't an issue for me either.

That was 12 years ago. We have been married for 5 years.

I mean, does the girl know what she wants and can she fend for herself in a romantic relationship? If so, then no, what are you worried about? The legal age is 18 in this country and if my nieces and their friends are any indication, women are maturing much faster than they used to and they matured faster than boys since almost always.

A more stringent test though is, are you taking advantage of her immaturity? As some others said, only you can answer those questions. But don't base it on how mature YOU were at 19, that's apples to oranges my friend.

People can be pretty immature at 40 also.

And not every relationship has to be the last one. You learn from every relationship.

Thank you!

This is something that I still struggle with but I'm coming to terms with the fact that you just can't magically land on the perfect person for you and that means that most of your relationships will break before you find someone to really go the distance with.

No. Imo, as long as both parties are consenting adults then I don't see the issue. Tbh, I thought society would be more progressive in regards to this by now.

It may be a better question to ask if you're immature enough to date her. A relationship doesn't rise to the level of the more mature person, it sinks to the level of the less. Do you consider yourself mature? If yes, you should move along. Are you a little behind your peers? This might be great for both of you! The amount of life experience and growing up is so great during 19 to 25 is so much per year that for this relationship to really serve you you probably need to be meeting in the middle. The idea that she should have to be making the sacrifices of a relationship you have in your late 20s isn't really fair to her.

Unless she's had some very difficult life experiences, she's probably not ready to forgo the types of relationships you have at 19, 20, 21 and she may really regret giving them up later. Maybe you didn't have those relationships which is why you're pursuing them now? If so, it may be a good fit!

If your life experiences up until now are similar (dating experience, financial experience, independence, working experience) then this relationship is more likely to avoid a power imbalance, but because she's so young, the most likely way for these to be true is if you're behind. It's unlikely she's going to have years of living independently while working to support herself under her belt, or several long term relationships.

A date or three to learn all this about her isn't going to hurt! Have fun! But if you learn she's inexperienced compared to you in most things, it doesn't matter how mature she is, it's unfair to her to put her in a power dynamic where she has to advocate for her needs with less life experience than you in so many categories.

This is a harsh one since from what you are saying I should probably move on. Honestly I'm still very much on the fence right now.

Thank you for the input!

I'm dating someone with about a 6-7 year gap. It's fine, age fades as you both get older, and honestly, just find someone who makes an excellent partner. Life is too short to worry about a small age gap.

I dated a 19-year-old at 25. We're almost at our 18 year anniversary. The further out you go, the less it matters, and 19 and 25 isn't bad.

She often states if we met earlier, we would have never dated.

Sometimes I remember my parents have a 18 years age gap, and I can't quite wrap my head around this.

I met my husband and we were the same ages. It was fine and we're still together years later. Just ask her out.

If you are feeling it is wrong, then it’s not right for you.

I personally don’t have any problem with age differences. Unless the older person is deliberately taking advantage of the younger.

Half your age, plus seven. If you're 25 that's 12.5+7=19.5. You're good to go.

Half your age + 7 is literally from a comedy movie. It's not a hard and fast rule.

Eh, it's a good rule still.

80/2=40, +7=47

Not sure if good....

Once you reach that age you can pretty much do what you want. I think if you can pull a 47 year old at 80, you should be good to go.

I'm not sure if your criticism is that a 45 year old should be considered old enough as well, or if you think that a 50 year old is not old enough to make the decision to date an 80 year old.

If a 47 year old is gonna date someone who's 80, what grounds would you have to say that isn't ok?

What movie? I've heard the rule but never the source.

OP is full of shit. Maybe it was in a movie, but it's not FROM a movie

Half your age plus seven is an unofficial rule of romance often credited to French author Max O’Rell (Léon Paul Blouet) in his 1901 love manual with the incredibly romantic title of Her Royal Highness Woman and His Majesty Cupid. 

You're 100% overthinking it. If you like her and she's into the idea, date her - more to the point, get to know her in that context.

If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. But I mean, I've been with my partner for 14 years (married for 8 of them) with a 7 year age gap, meeting at the opposite end of our 20s. Sometimes it works.

You're good on the age. Everyone is different. My wife was more mature than me at that age and was also around six years younger than me. Best decision ever for me to ask her out and eventually marry her. Been together 15 years now and just had our first child and couldn't be happier.

A good rule of thumb is half your age plus 7.

Indeed. I remember when that was the basic rule.

Also, women mature earlier than men, so at equal maturity it's quite typical for a woman to be 2 years younger than the man. At marriage in the USA, two years is actually the average age gap:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_age_at_first_marriage

Also, you might initially meet at 19/25. Next year you will be 20/26, then 21/28, etc. The age gap will become relatively smaller over time.

This is a stupid rule.

The good rule is to judge people as individuals and respect their autonomy.

I'm talking about general perception. Respecting people as individuals doesn't protect you from being seen as a creep, plus you're arguing for looser restrictions. I encourage you to try the math on that.

I'm perfectly happy with our societies coming to consensus on a general age where one is considered capable of making their own decisions, in this scenario particularly sexually and romantically. I think the age range between 16 and 18 that we have decided on in various western societies sounds reasonable. Our laws respect our autonomy from that point on, yet somehow society is starting to not do that and I don't think that's a good thing, or really very genuine either.

As far as perception, I have a philosophy of not giving a single fuck about perception. People that judge me aren't going to live my life for me, they're not going to come into my life and make me happy, so fuck their opinions. If I'm 40 and find love and happiness with an 18 year old and they don't like it they can kiss my ass.

So are you okay with 18 and 60? 19 and 70?

The larger the maturity gap, the greater the potential for abuse. The rule that I suggested keeps that gap narrow while allowing for accumulated experience.

I don't give a fuck what you do, but it's not a stupid guide.

100% OK with it, yes. We either respect someone's decisions or we don't. If we decide "someone is free to do what they want when they're 18" then that's that. If that's what they choose to do then it's none of my business.

There are plenty of abusive, coercive and controlling relationships between people of the same age range. There are plenty of 40 year old women getting mistreated in new relationships. If a 19 year old is with a 70 year old, I doubt there's some power dynamic there, most likely the woman is selling herself in a situation like that for a big payday, which is her choice. There are way less 70 year olds controlling their 18 year old girlfriends than there are 32 year olds doing it to their 30 year old girlfriends. It would seem age is not a good heuristic when trying to determine whether abuse is occurring, when it comes to adults at least.

You completely respect other people's choices based off of an arbitrary number of majority. You haven't proposed a smarter alternative. You've merely substituted one authoritarian defined arbitrary limit for another.

If my suggestion is stupid, then so is your law.

Personally, I think the number is arbitrary and there are 20 year olds incapable of making responsible decisions, and 15 year olds that are. But that's the world we live in, it's a compromise we make with our community to prevent abuse of little kids, and a way to set expectations of people, "by this age you need to be capable of looking out for yourself or you're going to have a hard time". I'm OK with this particular compromise, arbitrary though it may be. I don't know that there is a smarter alternative, and half your age plus seven is most definitely further from the goal than a set age when someone is expected to be able to navigate the world on their own. In older times (and in some less developed cultures even today), people were expected to be capable at puberty, in others it was when their fathers said they could, and we don't do that anymore because those systems almost always lead to fathers selling their children. So I'm happy with the current rule.

It's a rule of thumb, not a rule of law. It's generally accurate in broad strokes, but not guaranteed at a fine level. Generally, it leads to an imbalance of experiences, but some people have more experiences than their age would suggest or are just fine being seen as a trophy spouse, or any number of reasons it doesn't fit.

Yeah I understand that, but I don't think it's a good rule even generally speaking. It doesn't actually prevent abuse, all it does is disempower people from being autonomous via social stigmatization as a mechanism rather than penalty of law.

Checking this thread, I'm more convinced that I missed the train by a long shot. I'm about to be 33 and due to several circumstances, I haven't been able to date at all, or have any friends to begin with. Given the rule of half plus seven, finding a woman age 23 or higher with the same (lack of) romantic history is basically impossible.

Don't be so pessimistic about it, i thought as you do. However, if you meet a person fitting to you, it is of no importance that you have no experience. I had my first date recently, probably ten years later than most. While i was embarrassed, it was no problem for her and she was very considerate to me.

As of me, I don't feel as comfortable. I'd rather stay alone than having to somehow compensate for all the experience that I don't have and will certainly be compared to and found lacking. I can't imagine a person comparing me with her ex and saying "yeah, I can settle for him"

Oh man...

Please don't let feelings of being less than due to inexperience stop you from pursuing a relationship if that is something you want. Don't worry about comparison - you can't control that. What you can do is present your best self, as you are, and let the chips fall where they may. You might be surprised.

Eh, personally I'm a bit too jaded by rejection, not romantically, but from potential friends turned bullies. So I have no intention of pursuing anything romantic unless I'm 110% sure that the relationship will work for me.

Honestly, I think that when you love someone you never settle, you are excited that this person is in your life, even though they are not perfect. This is to say that once you fond someone that truly loves you their exs won't compare because you are the person that they want and it won't matter if one of the exs was better at some specific thing, you are better as a whole and they choose you.

Welp, there lies part of the problem - I don't think I offer much in the way of anything, and in fact I have more needs than what I can offer back. Which is precisely why I don't have any friends either.

Everyone has something to offer to someone. Flaws are human, I can say that some of the people that I loved the most were also the most flawed people I knew, and it didn't stop me from loving them and wanting then in my life.

Life is not transactional, don't discount yourself because you might not see your own value right now.

Youre both young, be safe, responsible and do whatever you want.

Honestly, I've got no objections to that age gap myself. It does quite depend on what type of people you are.

I've had a mate date a girl who was still dealing with high school drama and going out for drinks for the first time and I was kinda like "holy shit you really did snatch get straight out of high school". That's my issue with it though, maturity levels.

At the same time I had friends who both married and moved out at 18.

The numbers being different alone mean nothing to me.

At 25 I was dating to find out who my wife would be, if that's you and she has a problem with it... Well yeah.

Like pretty much everyone else said, your relative positions in life matter. A 25 year old who's already on their second job and making $125k/year should almost certainly not be dating someone who lives with their parents and is about to start their second semester of college.

Also like many people alluded to, the age gap matters less when you're older. There's not a lot of difference between a 35 year old and 30 year old, but there's a huge difference between a 10 year old and 5 year old.

I guess our situation is similar to what you describe in the first paragraph.

IMO the age gap doesn't matter as long as both parties get what they want out of the relationship. I would give it a chance, but try to find out if your relationship goals match up. I'm currently in a relationship with a bigger age difference than that and so far we are doing pretty good.

I've seen many kids well into their 30s, and I've seen many old souls just entering 20s. Maturity comes at different stages for everyone, and some don't get it at all. Don't Overthinking the age gap, what you really need is mental compatibility. If it's there then you'll be fine.

I don't think anyone can answer this question for you, it's a question for yourself. Do you personally feel like your taking advantage of her age difference? If no, then you're good. If the answer is anything other than no, then I think you need to reevaluate the relationship until you come up with a yes or no answer for yourself.

I am in no position to argue as I never was enganged in a relationship as a 24 y/o but I'd say if both consent to it and both communicate their issues there is nothing wrong with it. Both parties are now considered adults.
Communication is key. Communicate your worries and see how she react.

The only thing here is you're well over drinking age and she is awhile away. If that's part of your lifestyle it could be an issue. Otherwise if there's a difference in maturity that's the goal of dating, to find that out. 6 years different may seem big now but it's really not.

This is not in the USA so 18 is a legal adult who can drink

Who are we to get in the way of true love? In the words of Shia LeBeouf, just do it.

My grampa divorced my grandma and married a woman that's 12 years younger. They have been together for 40 years now and have 3 kids. Go for it dude.

Is she just starting college? A relationship with someone who's not at her school might be rough for her. I'd be forever disappointed if I didn't have those life experiences.

I met a woman once when I was 27, and we really clicked. She was amazing, fun to talk to, and beautiful. But then I found out she was only 19 years old and I nearly ended it. I didn't, because we got along so well.

I'm 43 now. She's 35. We've been married for 14 years. She is still amazing, fun to talk to, she has an incredible green thumb and she's grown awesome stuff for us to eat. She nursed a sick chicken back to life last week. The only nights we don't have sex are the nights we are recovering from a marathon session in bed. She has deep green eyes and beautiful long legs.

So based on my anecdotal "evidence", I say go for it.

I think you asking means you are not in it for the wrong reasons, don't deny yourself happiness becuase of what others might think

Yes. It is wrong. The gap isn't a big deal when you have both gotten to that mid 20s+, but who we are at 19 and 25 is vastly different. Please don't date teenagers. Don't make mental excuses to justify it. Take the compliment and move on.

Get a grip.

He should date her, it is fine.

I agree. I was in college at 19 and I would not have been able to grow as a person in the same way, if I had been dating a 25 year old at the time. You're just at different stages of life at this point.

I'm not saying it's impossible for this to work out well for some people. Clearly in the comments here it has, and I have friends with a greater age difference who are now happily married.

But in general, no I don't think this is a good idea. If it was the same age gap but meeting later in life, no big deal. But a 19 year old is at a very different point in life than a 25 year old and she needs to be able to grow on her own outside of a relationship with an older person.

You are right to consider the age gap, I would say the best bet for you to mitigate your concerns is to not put any sort of commitment in place until she's old enough that you're not concerned about the age gap anymore.

At 19 years old, you're not even old enough to drink if you're interested the US. I would probably say give her until 22 before you do anything that's going to evolve any sort of commitment or possible long-term consequence for either of you. In the meantime, there's nothing wrong with some low commitment dating.

Thank you! This is a really interesting tip!

Anyone can date a girl over 18 so long as the relationship is consentual

The legality is not the issue here dude

No it's about two adults agreeing on what they want

Imagine assuming someone is not mature enough without knowing the person that much. Not everyone is like you

If you don't date her, you might find her dating another 25yo guy.

Maybe but thats not really the point...

Nothing wrong with it. when youre 30 and she is still young and hot youll be happy you made that decision.

Really not the point here, also I don't date for looks and couldn't care less when and how her body ages, its all about the person for me.

Then date a 40 old with kids.

Maybe I will :)

When youre over there washing up for the night and you notice she already has mens body wash in her shower. Thats because youre part of a roster of men.

Cool, maybe we can all be friends!