The way this is written out really irks me.

Striker@lemmy.worldmod to Mildly Infuriating@lemmy.world – 630 points –
210

I would pass the guy and then let him know he was passed by a queer in a fiesta. You know he'd just hate that.

I once got passed by a rainbow-decal prius with the bumper stickers "0-60 eventually" and "you just got passed by a lesbian in a unicorn outfit"

Sure enough when we stopped at the next light, there were two rather lovey-dovey women in the front seat, and the driver was wearing what looked like a unicorn onesie. It was fantastic.

Incidentally, my wife now has a similar unicorn onesie and wears it when we go grocery shopping.

Now I have to wonder, does she wear a unicorn onesie all the time or does she put it on over her regular street clothes before driving? If the latter, why? Which came first, the sticker or the onesie? If her partner drives the car, is she required to wear the onesie?

If her partner drives the car, is she required to wear the onesie?

The sticker makes no mention of driving, so I would think that as long as someone in the vehicle is both lesbian and wearing the onesie, its conditions have been fulfilled.

Thr bumper sticker specifies that you have been passed by the car therefore the car must be moving.

Ah, but the person in the passenger seat might also be considered as having passed, no?

So as long as there is someone in the vehicle who is a lesbian and also in a unicorn onesie, it's still technically correct

Well my wife likes to wear hers when she goes to pick up food, so maybe this woman likes to wear it when she's driving.

Heck I know someone who refuses to drive without a specific pair of gloves "because driving doesn't feel right without them" and they have a panic attack without them.

Or maybe they take turns wearing it. Or even just on special occasions and I happened to witness one.

Whatever the case, it made my day

The car doesn’t start unless the driver is wearing the onesie. It’s an after market thing.

Plot twist, she makes the unicorn onesie and that's her marketing strategy.

Have you heard the one where your fiesta takes adderall?

It turns into a focus.

Not original material but I had to say it

Haha

It's true. I had a focus before the fiesta (the dealer actually bought my focus for more than it was worth and traded the fiesta for it; some stock related issue and they were desperate for focuses). They're practically identical vehicles.

Guys like this are fun to bait past a speed trap in a little econobox.

5 more...

be kind to the poor pfc, he's paying by the week for seven years for that shitbox.

I've heard that people who drive a Dodge Ram are most likely to have a DUI on their record.

For real. Might have changed since then though.

Dickheads drive dodge

Dickheads drive Dodge pickup trucks

Why?

Because some people only live inside their tiny little bubble and can’t think outside of it. So therefore if I don’t have a need or want for a truck then no one else should.

That only works if what you want doesn't also affect other people. If you buy a giant pick up truck that endangers other people, for no other reason than your own ego, you're probably an asshole.

Your world view is so tiny. You don’t know shit.

You’re probably an asshole. Only because your own ego is so great and your own mind is so limited you can’t take time to think outside your own tiny little box.

It’s sad really. Also don’t leave your house ever. Your actions endanger other people.

1 more...

Have you never had to tow a trailer? Haul lumber or stone? Bring home a large appliance or furniture? Help a friend move? Or are you just assuming anyone who uses a vehicle you don't need is an asshole?

None of the idiots who brag about driving a semi have done any of that either. They're grocery haulers at best. Just like 4x4 princesses. The loudest mouth breathers are the ones who think that driving on a unpaved dirt road is off-roading.

The rest of sensible humankind knows that, for any of what you mentioned, it's astronomically cheaper to rent an actual truck for the couple of days every other year that you actually have to do any of it than owning, and slaving over a loan, for an inefficient, expensive and inadequate machine that can't do any of those task properly.

None of the idiots who brag about driving a semi have done any of that either.

That's definitely not true. People can still have a self-image as a kind of asshole truck driver, and also still use their truck. People make this argument, that somehow these kind of aesthetic qualities have some sort of bearing on who does or doesn't use their truck, and to me, it just kind of comes across like the only people who are allowed to drive trucks are the people who are acting in socially acceptable ways.

The argument is less about the people who use their truck, and more about the relative frequencies of use for everyone generally. Most people would be better covered by a rental. And then we could also make the argument that our development patterns would encourage the use of trucks far too much anyways.

Edit: wait, did you mean to type semi, or hemi? I kind of assumed hemi, but if you mean semi that kind of changes everything and I don't know how to respond to that.

I did meant hemi. English as a third language and all. And honestly I don't care about whether they use their truck or not. It's about the statistical probability of both being an intolerable fuckface who has an inefficient machine instead of a personality, and bragging that they need it and it is the best choice for certain heavy tasks. When the people who actually need to do those heavy task regularly would chose a pickup track last. Because it would be the worst choice possible only second to a Twingo or something. Because I've seen sedans deal better with towing trailers than some of the crap they sell to Americans as trucks.

So you mean in your limited experience it’s cheaper. Which is fine. If you found solution for you good stuff. But your limited experience isn’t the reality for everyone.

Sounds like you don’t have a good understanding of the machines you are even talking about. Try expanding your world a little. Be less about making judgements about things you don’t understand.

Idiot says to the guy whose entire family were trades professionals for two generations who had owned, worked on and driven everything from buses and box trucks to 18 wheelers and forklifts, that he doesn't understand machines and need to expand their world. Stay classy Internet.

Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. None of those needed or would have been better with a pickup. Have driven a pickup as well. Was pointless and crap.

1 more...
1 more...

I read that too. I think the 2500 model had the highest rate.

Unless another model has truck balls, which doubles the trucks overall douche-value.

People who make poor life choices are more likely to make other poor life choices.

It was BMW drivers, rams were a close second to Tesla in driving incidents and highest overall combined incidents and dui.

Saw that recently as well. Wondering if the stats are US versus the world. BMWs just don't seem common enough in the US to hold the top spot. Unless every driver is constantly tanked at all times.

At least the alcoholic grindset yuppies are well represented by the BMW 4 series and Audi A4 in the top 5.

Absolutely zero surprise of Ram trucks being #1. The only vehicle that has ever crashed into me was a Ram. All the tires were mismatched and the driver came to his deposition with alcohol on his breath. They’re a fun bunch, those Ram drivers.

I'll rarely see Rams used as actual work trucks. At least around me, it's all Fords and Chevy. And if it a Ram, it's got a Cummins in it. Hemi is weekend warrior shit.

1 more...

Any soldier of worth I’ve ever known, …any true soldier, wouldn’t advertise their profession as such.

Wannabe.

Nothing more.

This screams boot to me, lol. I bet you they financed it at something ridiculous too.

Is there an r/JustBootThings on Lemmy or Kbin? Some of the shit on there was hilarious.

I said the same thing. My ex-husband was military (though not boot at all) and you could absolutely find this truck in the px parking lot. Probably driven by a 20 year old with a kid and a pregnant wife who goes shopping off base in his uniform solely so people will thank him for his service.

We were all boots once. Some of us grew out of it.

Boot?

Boot is a derisive term, in this case it's referring to young inexperienced people fresh out of boot camp. The mindset refers to doing trashy and/or foolish things usually coupled with a strong sense of entitlement ("thank me for my service!").

Not sure who downvoted you, nothing wrong with asking questions to learn stuff.

wanna bet he's a 92f or some shit?

maybe a 74a who's huffed too much ojt

Exactly. Most actual soldiers would say Marine, etc. rarely use soldier.

Unless they are in the Army. Then they would rightfully call themselves a soldier. Soldier, Airman, Marine, Seaman, Guardian and Spacie. I guess not sure on the last one

Guardian... haha... Finally the semen have someone they can laugh at.

Eh, a lot of us did stupid stuff like put a CIB sticker on or something. This is a whole 'nother level.

The fuck is a hemi?

A Hemi indicates the top of the combustion chamber has a Hemispherical shape, rather than the typical frying pan type shape.

The increased size of the chamber means additional fuel and air can be introduced, which increases power output.

It's old tech like carburetors. It's wasteful on fuel, but MOPAR fans love it.

Doesn't it also mean a higher compression ratio? Meaning more power behind the same A:F ratio? Or am I as dumb as the guy who put the stickers on that truck?

"Due to the shape of the hemispherical combustion chamber, it's difficult to raise the compression ratio high enough to fully take advantage of its superior shape, irrespective of the brand on the valve cover"

https://www.motortrend.com/how-to/hemi-engine-pros-cons/

This is also interesting:

"If the 2003-present Gen-III Hemi isn't a real hemi engine, then why do we call it that? With good reason, Chrysler (now FCA) wanted to extend the "Hemi" branding to its third-generation Hemi V-8 because of the instant recognition and status it carries."

It's something rednecks will ask other rednecks about whether they have one or not. If you see that sticker, there is about a 30 percent chance that the driver of the vehicle is drunk.

It's a type of engine design found mainly in certain pickup trucks. I don't know why but it's an important thing to some people.

You just By A Driving

Got

Passed Soldier A Hemi

Ares

Apparently one who isn't literate either.

People who treat driving as some kind of competition should have their license permanently revoked.

When I’m driving all day, I try as hard as possible to forget who passes me and who I pass. This little kid in my mind is like “pay attention, lars, don’t let them get there first!”. It’s gross.

I kinda do but the only one im competeing with is myself and the shitty dirt "road" I decided to drive on.

You, just by a driving, got passed. Soldier, a hemi!!

Hope I'm not the only one trying to put these words to Smooth Criminal.

You just got passed by, you just got hit by, a soldier in a hemi!

I'm speeding, I kill people for the government, and my engine has hemispherical combustion chambers!

and my engine has hemispherical combustion chambers!

Not even that anymore. HEMI is just a marketing term.

Wow, he's got TWO things to base his whole personality on. What a complex, nuanced existence he must lead. 🙄

And here I am with like 10 hobbies and unable to keep up with them. I still find myself unable to communicate with others though as my hobbies are niche and not the norm for most people.

I wouldn't recommend using vinyl lettering on a RAM as your method of communication. Try a makerspace, they're wonderfully wide-ranging in terms of hobbies and interests.

Can I use vinyl lettering on my Chrysler Pacifica PEV? It's the same maker of RAM but more soccer mom and less douche nozzle. How about "You just passed a middle aged man getting 40mpg"

I am often amazed by the aggressively-driven minivans I see. It's like they're upset they're driving a minivan, and taking it out on the rest of us, or something. I don't know.

I mean, I see plenty of other aggressively-driven vehicles as well, but the minivans always stand out because they seem like pretty much the antithesis of a vehicle you would expect to be driven aggressively. No one is buying a minivan for the performance, handling, or cool factor.

I don't have anything against minivans - they're extremely useful vehicles for hauling people or things and reasonably fuel-efficient while doing it.

But also he's passin people. Getting ahead!!

These kinda folks look the best when they crawl away unharmed from the twisted pile of useless scrap that used to be that truck

What’s hilarious is they know it annoys you. This kind of driver lives to take up space in your life. They’d build a giant statue belching fire and yelling “REMEMBER ME” in your backyard if they could.

Gotta love this guy making soldiering and being a dickhead his public identity.

That's exactly my response to this. "Okay???"

Like, congrats on being a soldier, I mean, respect for doing that (except for that you can literally just walk in and become one, but fine they're braver than I am.) But then driving a Hemi? Anyone can do that. It does not require a college education to purchase a car and drive it.

This is a man who has very little going on in their life and has to act super proud to make up for it.

obligatory: "you just got by a driving passed soldier a hemi"

the sort of man who names his car, and puts the name on the car, and feels the need to include quotes, because in writing as in all areas of life, he doesn't know what he's doing, though he'd have a sad little testosterone fit if you told him so. it's the real meaning of the word removed

The Greek god of war, how fitting for someone that through their choice of vehicle has declared war on pedestrians.

I named my truck, but "Old Clunky" doesn't exactly jump out as the kind of name you'd want to advertise.

you just by a driving got passed soldier a hemi!!!

Round here we call this “micro-penis syndrome”, the urge to tell everyone that this is how they are compensating for possessing what they believe to be tiny penis.

Smaller penises get way harder, they have their own charm.

It’s their perception. For all we know they are average size. Penis is being used as a euphemism for masculinity. The point being, these types of signs are pure posturing, “proving” that they are the “alpha male”.

Omg that’s soooo original

Another prime example

You caught the trope did you.

Be more original

Didn’t know the goal to winning life was “being more original”, thank you for this lesson internet stranger. You are so kind to educate a dunce such as myself.

I mean I don’t mind the sentiment but the way it was presented as an original thought we all needed a lecture on was a bit much yeah

Pardon my ignorance but is driving a Hemi a "good" thing or a "bad" thing and thus an insult to be passed by?

Dudes that say “hemi” still are stuck in the past and stupid. I say this as someone who owns and drives a Ram 2500 “Hemi” (don’t worry, no DUIs). It’s a marketing term at this point that dumb grunts (and I don’t just mean in the military) buy into because they feel special. It’s like dudes that say they drive a Cummins or Power Stroke (yes all of these are as erotic as they sound). It’s an engine. At the end of the day it’s kind of a crappy one too. Most Dodge Hemi’s have what’s known as Hemi-tick that is this sort of constant clicking on idle, they’re incredibly inefficient, they make mediocre power compared to their competition and the reliability on them is questionable at best. Overall good maintenance will keep these motors working fine and running for a long time, but the paint on every Ram will fade and chip, the clear coat will crap out, and the interior will eventually start to rattle and fall apart faster than the competition. 10/10 vehicles.

Why did you buy the Hemi if you think it's bullshit?

Because in 2022 with an 840 credit score I got .99% financing and 5k off MSRP. Which NO ONE was offering. Everyone wanted 5-10k if not more OVER sticker. Plus at the time there was only three trucks with front and rear lockers and only two with factory winches. Of which FCA/Stelantis made both. I needed those features due to my liking to go far out into the middle of nowhere without anyone else but my wife and I. I don’t want us stuck somewhere (not that I’m going to put us into those situations purposefully) so I wanted every goody available to get unstuck if push comes to shove.

Plus it’s not like the alternatives are much better now. The 5.3/6.2 from GM with DFM has problems and fails quickly, the 6.2 from Ford is OK and I haven’t heard of many problems with the 7.2 Godzilla. That said the 10 speed trans from them is problematic allegedly and the Ram has the ZF 8 speed which is both bullet proof and also readily available since BMW and VW/Audi also use it. Toyota only had the 5.7 at the time which was thirsty and old. I wanted the new Tundra, but unfortunately I knew it would be years before I could get one easily and for a reasonable cost. Now for my current truck I don’t intend to replace it hopefully ever. It gets 7k oil changes on synthetic and I take care of the paint and ceramic coat it to prevent the oxidation problems. Hemi tick is present, but it’s not detrimental. If the engine blows the good news is that every recruit that financed a 392 crashed them within months which means there’s good motors out there with low miles if I need a new one and they’re relatively cheap and easy to replace myself.

It's supposed to be a good thing. I don't get the context of the stickers either unless it's just supposed to be a useless explanation of the situation.

It’s supposed to be a good thing

What part of it is good in any way?

  • Guy's in the military: yeah war. Yeehaw...
  • He's proud to drive a gas guzzling truck

I didn't say I think it's a good thing, just that the truck guy probably think it is.

It's a V8 engine with a massive bore. It's fast and powerful. Being passed by one isn't really an insult. It's like "okay, I'm driving a corolla and a V8 just passed me, this is to be expected."

Hemi basically translates to a powerful engine. Purchased by certain people.

3 more...

Yeah, we keep missing recruitment goals. This is what happens when you have to take what you can get. ><

Many veterans suffer from traumatic brain injury. It's not nice to make fun of them. Tho' it is just a little amusing.

What is the point of that?

It's the new truck nutz.

He's compensating for his poor self image.

Don't you put the noble truck nuts and this man in the same category, thanks

The spacing or the stickers? The spacing maybe so he can see out the back of that window

I'm sensing high levels of Big Douchebag Energy

Also, most everyone missed OP's gripe lol. No worries, brah! "Don't dead open inside," I hear ya.

"you just waited patiently at a traffic signal behind a soldier driving a Hemi !!!"

"You just merged onto the freeway behind a soldier driving a Hemi !!!"

"You just momentarily shared a roundabout with a soldier driving a hemi !!!"

"You just got served coffee at a drive through after a soldier driving a Hemi !!!"

"If you happen to be a soldier driving a hemi, that means a soldier driving a hemi is driving behind a soldier driving a hemi !!!"

If you think about It Its because you can open the rear window and the text is still readable

Nothing more boot than a Texan soldier driving a dumb truck.

Ignoring the content of the words, they probably spaced it out like that so they could still see out the rear view mirror.

Could've saved them the window space by just writing "inbred"

Pardon my ignorance, but what is a "hemi" and why should I care if I got passed by it? I believe all veterans deserve respect, but also they should still respect others. I know guys who were in the army that, if they hadn't enlisted, would probably have ended up in prison instead. Meaning, that just because someone has served in the army as a soldier, it doesn't necessarily mean they deserve the highest of all possible praise.

I have family in the military and they're all good people, so I'm not putting down anyone in the military - but I believe there are many other professions that should be getting lots of thanks for their service to the public also.

service to the public

Dear fucking god, service? What fucking service? 😂😂

Wasting trillions of dollars to destabilise the entire fucking planet? 😂😂😂

Well I don't know what "service" goes around destabilizing the fucking planet, but whatever it is, I want to buy shares in it. I know a good thing when I see it. Also - what about doctors, surgeons who repair bones and heal people, EMTs and first responders and fire fighters? Or are all those people unworthy of praise for their service in your opinion?

what is a "hemi"

V8 engines from Chrysler.

why should I care if I got passed by it?

Nobody cares, really.

all veterans deserve respect

They don't but even so, odds are this guy didn't serve in active conflict thus not a war veteran. Joining the arms forces does not make you a war veteran and thus deserving of your respect.

I would argue that they deserve less respect that no veterans. Imagine being so stupid that you join a war crime force.

Not necessarily stupid. There's a reason military recruitment primarily comes from the poorest parts of the nation with the least opportunities

Maybe if my neighbors stopped voting for the party that wants them to stay poor, they would have more opportunities besides being tools of American Imperialism?

I mean yeah I'd love for that to happen. Doesn't change the fact that there are plenty of people who have/continue to see it as the only realistic path out of whatever situation they're in. We're not in disagreement that the root cause of it is bad.

What an immensely gay fucking thing to plaster on your window.

Please don't associate my community with that. I don't want to be compared to the soldier who would put that on their truck.

Sorry. That was a stupid word choice on my end.

It's really a strange thing to put on a truck window. But I hope someday we can move beyond associating dumb things with "gay." Or using "gay" as a slur or a putdown.

It's really a strange thing to put on a truck window. But I hope someday we can move beyond associating dumb things with "gay." Or using "gay" as a slur or a putdown.

You're right. It's not something I generally use in conversation (not since the early 2010s anyway) and I'm not sure why I thought it was cool to say it on here. Just a shitty reactionary thing that I blurted out.