As badly described as possible, what is your favorite video game?

Person with huge pockets builds a house that gets blown up because the door was left open.

You throw cubes in transdimensional holes to win a cake.

try to cure your burnout by waking up and starting work at 6am and passing out at 2am every single day for the rest of your life

Speaking skills - 0

Sword and shield skills - 100

You end up stranded on a foreign planet. You need to build a rocket so you can go home, but unfortunately you have to build a whole manufacturing facility to do that. As if this wasn't hard enough, the inhabitants of the planet are environmentalist assholes and will do anything in their power to stop you.

You're finally awake in death row and then spend the whole adventure, shouting to others, trying to avoid knee injury

A guy just wants to leave his home country and see the world, but his dad won't let him. Even when he gets past his dad, he still can't quite make it. It's in the blood.

Getting insulted by a sassy robot while you solve puzzles and try not to die.

Upon being released from prison, you thrust yourself directly into the local religions and governments until everyone can agree that you're the rebirth of divinity, at which point you doom the game world to death by giant fucking meteor by poking a large heart with really specific silverware.

Florida men crashland on planet, commit war crimes and sell drugs.

Kid gets sick of being told to clean his room and runs away from home, but it's more difficult than he anticipates. In desperation, he reaches out to his estranged relatives for help, which just makes his dad even more mad.

you land on an alien planet, burn down trees, pollute the air, exterminate the native wildlife, drain the land of all natural resources, pave it all over with concrete, put some fish on a rocket, do not elaborate, leave

Wolfman dies, kills some monkeys, does some rope stuff, performs eye surgery and kills himself (depending on what ending you go for).

A guy goes to work and encounters unexpected events

Tattooed rooftop parkour delivery person saves sister.

Ooh, look at this beautiful vast open world! Let's go explo-YOU DIED

YOU DIED

YOU DIED

YOU DIED

Teams Fight over Rocks. Rarely they play a form of soccer or against robots. Some characters throw suspiciously colored fluids on other players. There are cosmetics

Zombie convict secret agent gets sidetracked in a "never ravine' by secret village witch ghosts to find a wacked-out politician in a volcano.

You're an alien frog archaeologist that launches themself into space in a rocket jerry-rigged out of wood and ancient alien goat-person tech. After dying repeatedly in several excruciating and brutal ways you learn to embrace death.

The little man, underpaid and under-equipped, does grind work for big corpo. Beer is the only reward.

italian plumber crushing turts

a gun that makes holes

not bullet holes

Guys, I have the best idea - guys! I hav- Guys! Best Idea! - I have the best idea ever! Guys! Listen! We'll put 64 huge rockets on a tiny pod and then forget to add parachutes. Brilliant.

You take your big sticky balls,rub them all over the world, and show off the results to a your daddy in tights.

You're looking for a gun. A gun that makes holes. Not bullet holes.

Holy crap this thing is hard, I can't guess any

Cowboy gets convinced to do one more job every time...

I can't tell you anything about it you just have to play it.

I married my cousin, had an affair with my sister and then joined a religious sect that requires me to be naked all the time.

speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out

Your parents have a disgusting basement, and crying is an effective weapon against fillicide.

Fall really far a lot. Stick sticks to big sticks. Throw fruit to avoid confrontation. Frequent fashion changes. Still can’t pet dogs.

Incompetent engineer arrives to work late, botches an experiment, and ends up ripping a hole in the universe to a world full of "creatures". He then mercilessly murders the scared creatures while sabotaging efforts by security forces, and an elderly man in a suit, to resolve the situation.

That one with all the dragons. You know the one, buM bada bum bada dum dum dum, ohhh OHHHH, BUM BADABUM.

Groups of people fight over gravel

Your caretaker offers you cake so you kill her. Twice.

You're supposed to be looking for your kidnapped son, but that's kinda hard in a post-apocalyptic wasteland. Might as well just do whatever you want and hopefully run into him ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You settle a dispute between two snakes who can't agree on whether or not to turn off the light. Not as many swamp levels as the sequels.

You eat stuff while ghosts try to kill you.

You don't get it, I HAD to fuck my sister. Our kids will be so good at everything

It would have been easier to just fix the crashed ship than to build a whole factory to make a new one

Hit things with fists so that you can hit them with farming implements later on.

Keep burning to death over and over again as you desperately try to gather knowledge of previous civilizations in order to save(?) the universe.

Experience xenophobia as a lizard-person in a racism simulator

You wake up in a quarrantine zone. Despite having no medical qualifications, you need to cure a global pandemic before you are permitted to leave.

If you manage to succeed, your reward is your life saved and then more debt than you can hope to repay in a thousand lifetimes when you leave quarrantine.

You pull animal-like creatures from their natural habitats to make them fight each other in a way that they somehow consent, in a franchise that systematically weeds out the good ideas from each game while retaining the bad ones.

Very, very flat people open a very, very old door.

It’s the pew pew game. You go pew pew and everyone is like aaaaargh, and then you take their stuff. Bigger guns, more pew pew.

You try to keep smiley faces from turning red until cats inevitably make your game run at 0.2 FPS.

Person and person and person don't like other person. The person and person and person work Make other person no have place. Make big word. Person big word person big word other person big word other person.

Make big mad. Many time. Person say big word person. Some person make no person. Make finish person and person and person big no happy, maybe big happy. Make big finish.

Inspired by person do thing

A man gets a scam letter and decides to figure out why he is being catfished.

You're a disenfranchised spacefaring race perpetually performing an, ultimately, menial task in an extremely hostile and dangerous environment. You only exist to create wealth for the company, at the expense of your health and wellbeing. Personal relationships are fleeting as you only interact with strangers you are randomly teamed up with to complete a job at which the company has neither adequately trained or equipped you to do well. Climbing the social ladder in your community is a function of finding ways to more efficiently extract resources from a ripe planet unable to sufficiently defend itself from your advanced technology.

I don't think I followed your prompt, but I got carried a way.

You see an alien peeking around a corner. You know to have a 99% hit chance. You miss.

Just trying to live my life and get with big tiddied Cleopatra. Gandhi comes over and cock blocks me with nukes. That's all right though, my Giant Death Robot is teabagging Delhi right now while I launch a satellite. - Abe Lincoln

Young scientist with a PhD fucks up scientific experiment

Five assholes, four idiots, and then there's me.

Keep doing the same damn show over and over, the definition of insanity.

Might refer to more games than one, but just let it be.

Because anyway, you eventually lose your humanity.

You are the Janitor's assistant.

You leave every single room looking like a literal tornado passed through.

You are, in all probability, the best assistant the janitor has had.

This displeases some of the higher-ups, but they don't seem to be able to do anything to stop you or the janitor.

Another game: God is about to die literally any minute now, but it's probably fine because God is really, really, really fast.

A ginger lass fighting with appliances while suffering from aggressive hay fever.

Man leaves gang, teaches dominatrix how to do her job, gets really good at dancing and finds his love for slot car racing.

Commit genocide and destroy the environment for fun and profit!

Smug accelerating rodent and company gaze on in horror as a mad scientst pisses on the moon.

I'm looking for a gun that makes holes, but not bullet holes. You'll figure it out.

A girl relies in old emails, social media posts and obsolete sites to understand the reality of the world and avoid murderbots' attempts to destroy everybody.

A farmer coughs in your face, and then you slowly get sick and eventually die.

get things; make things;

You play as a mailman who for some reason is asked by every faction to fight on their side of the war.

You attack a tree, then make tools to attack things even better. You need to now attack dirt and then stone to make better tools. After that, you can attack more stone in hopes of finding valuables. When you find blue thing, you can attack solid cola, and make a rectangle, then curse it by lighting it on fire. Now you agree in hell. You should be proud of yourself. Now you can attack fires with your tools, or if you collected snowballs before, you can also torture them. When they die, you pull out their penis, break them to make fire-thing. Then kill living magmas, and then extract their magma that was inside them, and make it into magma balls. After that, you can kill tall black people, and collect their balls. Then you can merge the fiery-things, the magma balls, and the black people's balls to make some eyeballs. You can then throw the eyeballs (one at a time), and follow them until they fall down where you stand. Then you can start attacking dirt and stone again, until you get into an underground house. Find a room that has a rectangle made from the eyeball's material, go there, and put the remaining eyeballs there, but look out for gray bugs! Now you get to the void on a floating solic cola, then use the stone you attacked to go to another floating thing that is made of solid pee. You should see big dragon. If you made bows, you can start shooting, and when big dragon is down, you can also attack it with a sword. But beware! Big dragon can also fuck you over, and shoot you out of the void into space. If you managed to destroy big dragon, at the center of the pee island, you should see cola spawn inside solid cola. Just jump in there, and you beat the game!

moon's haunted

There is a box. It's a very old box. It might have a thing in it. Everyone tells you to not open it. The game tells you to not open it. You probably opened it on your first playthrough.

You spend hundreds of hours gaining XP in a skill you'll never actually use

I'm a pretty strange dad with coordination issues.

Worker that wants to unionize destroys all his company's shit with a hammer.

Alien crashes on planet and murders the native population in order to build contraptions that pull rocks out of the ground and cooks and smashes them together

Normal mailman gets shot and robbed, embarks on quest for revenge, acidentaly changes politics of the area forever.

You get stranded on an alien planet and in the process of trying to get home you get distracted with destroying the planets resources and native population

Horse armor.

A russian dude with schizophrenia is stuck in the subway

You take getting shot in the face very personally and end up deciding the fate of an entire metropolitan area. There is also sand everywhere.

fetishized well dressed fleshsteel interdemensional abominations commit intergalactic genocide at the behest of their flower based mother figure.

experience storytelling featuring family values, political commentary, and conversations with an actual wall!

You try to land on the moon but you just keep missing for some reason. So you go to read alien scriptures on some hourglass or whatever

Go spelunking and become immune to nearly all forms of damage, only to step on a drop of funny pink liquid, get turned into a sheep, get set on fire and die.

In a world full of robots you live your live in the wilds until your stepdad gets killed and all of a sudden all these religious tribes around you want you to save humanity.

I dig hole to protect myself.

Drunk man shouts at over grown lizards

Just to quote a claasic:

"Blah blah blah, Mr. Freeman"

Basically 3D Galaga with furries.

You form a group consisting exclusively of mentally ill folks and embark on a journey trying to genocide tadpoles.

“Hey Siri, how much meat can you get off an adult male moose?” “Moose can be processed for over 200 kilograms of meat.” “WELL THIS IS FUCKING BULLS-oh no the pretty, scary lights are back.”

Super powerful space ninjas with mommy issues shoot big ass guns.

Xenogenocide

You fuck your way until you gather a big enough force to save the Galaxy from blue squids

So like, there's this Gate, right?

Gigantic balls that you shove your nose into.

Also, people who purposefully pretend to drive poorly because their parents don't openly show them affection.

A man's quest to murder their father turns the whole world upside down.

I just, like, want to like, grow my plants in peace, man.. and like, totally be one with nature on the edge of town, and like..give these really awesome crystals to this cute chick with blue hair who totally, like, picks up the cosmic vibe of them.

Virgin seeking love.

Enjoys long walks on beaches, lakes, rot etc. Travelling is my passion!

Environmentally conscious. Believes in, loves and supports global warming. Burn those trees down!

Dislikes: lobster.

Interested? Write me back soon! I love a good old finger written note. I'm old fashioned like that x

A drunk politician ruins a random high school student's life.

Navy SEAL tries to convince the government that mechacuttlefish aren't a conspiracy theory.

One armed topless homosexual tricks gullible mass murderer with a shape changing laser sword into freeing him from super sleep meanwhile robin williams impersonator fools an entire religious group into believing he is not one of them somehow hiding his space wizard powers from all the other space wizards before basically killing them all.

Shoe stealing simulator

Living pink marshmallow terrorizes an entire planet

Funny masked people rob the Whitehouse at 15 fps and get kicked or lose connection before you finish.

There's cubes

A group comprised of individual avant-garde artists who are also amateur athletes each travel around a city collecting art supplies while listening to broadcasts so they can create several colourful palimpsests without getting beaten or shot.

Eh kills aleins and doesnt afraid of anything

Arrive on shores of Foreign lands, Find piece of books, find closed doors, find crystals that go into a temple, oh,

tradie goes on murderous rampage, breaks into multiple historical buildings trying to find his girlfriend.

Not necessarily my favorite, but I couldn't think of something better:

A girl who orgasms at the thought of battling children, little miss crippling social anxiety, and mister daddy/mommy issues all need your help!

Rock and stone

Your mom dies, your brother runs away so now your dad spends all his time looking for him, and your village gets overtaken by fascists, oh and you're like 12. Somehow it's your job to save the world though.

Run around an island with a bunch of talking, bipedal animals.

A group of teenagers who hate loud music die. Then they eat a bunch of food and meet/become god. Also maybe they become better people or something? IDK, I'm still trying to influence fashion to min/max my stats.

A corporation send you to the most beatiful alien planet and you will put floating concrete platforms everywhere

Someone's fursona goes to war against an ecocidal billionaire with his robot boyfriend and vandalises a lot of street lights while making PG sex jokes

Not the 3rd or 4th time you were a prisoner, but the 2nd.

A group of drunks fend off dingoes long enough to brew more booze.

Jumping around obstacles and running away from gunshots, but you'll spend most of the time falling to your death.

You're an ex CEO of a Japanese company, but somehow are still pulled in their affair.

You touch something you shouldn't have, then nobody would ever believe what you've seen, but you keep trying to convince every species in the galaxy.

Speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out

Virgin man dismantles mafia fighting over a tiny ass piece of land. He beats up everyone (sometimes with a rpg) without killing anyone ever while doing random bullshit like racing toy cars on the side and helping people around the city.

Also he crosses paths with a less kind one eyed man who runs a brothel.

Big chickens, big cats, big squirrels, big whatever the fuck that thing is. Better kill or capture them using my big sword.

You're an outlaw who steals the pets of other people and must recruit them to stop a corrupt mayor and his army of evil Power Rangers from setting up animal abuse factories.

rock paper scissors with aliens

Fight for scraps and die. Die 5 more times from getting beat with a rock. Fight for more scraps and get small base. Lose all scrap in base from asshole clan. Beat head against wall in frustration. Oh and die some more and do it all again tomorrow.

You kinda play with reincarnations of Adam and Eve but original Eve was kind of Adam's mom. Current Adam has a lot of trauma he tries to shut away with different personalities but then the ghost of his previous incarnation takes over his father's body to try to push the traumatized personality out. Eventually you discover a kid on a lab who comes to life in your presence and she tells you it was an even older incarnation of Adam who created her artificially based on Eve because nobody could have natural kids anymore at that time but that didn't really wipe humans out either. And all through the game some sort of AI with the personality of some very old folks had been spying on you through your save files. In the end current Adam and Eve fall out of the sky naked but inside a giant robot, with all your friends watching you from a distance because they can't fly since your actions made every other giant robot stop working, except for yours.

Thalassophobia generator (and drowning simulator).

Geat beat up enough times and you'll become a pensioner

Wake up in a zombie apocalypse and then die after over 100 playtime hours with the same character because of a little mistake losing everything.

8 foot tall penis beast murders everyone you meet

Participate in dream therapy and fall asleep and follow a doctor's voice as you have your mind broken over and over by optical illusions until you wake up and then cry irl at the ending speech.

It makes you think about sucking your own dick.

Let me sleep for centuries while pure evil kills everyone.

Commit crimes but it’s a speedrun.

Edit: no one has it yet

you fight water

::: spoiler Spoiler the Creeper World Series :::

You and a girl are having fun at the fair until a portal opens. You enter the portal for everyone to claim your girl is a queen.

Spikey hair man, a stuffed animal friend, a meow meow best animal friend, a cigarette smoking space uncle, black gun arm man, big boobie bestie, christian pink girl, thieving ninja girl, and emo vampire-esque goth daddy re-enact Armageddon and also fight long white hair man with mommy issues. Also a dirty old man with floating crystals, no legs, and the ability to fly gives you advice.

A rustic family's lives are torn apart by the rise of capitalism driven by the boredom of an immortal.

Some dude slaughters tons of animals and robs historical buildings in order to kill a lizard.

An endless conveyor belt of new recruits get lasered in the face, squeezed by snakes, shocked by electric batons, and mind controlled while trying to save their home from the ayylmaos.

They also frequently have Sears photoshoots taken of their squads to plaster around the game as propaganda.

(answer: click my profile and see the only community I mod. Then join us!)

Going from point A to point B, now with more dead whales.

Five soldiers of specialized anti terrorism forces battle against some other five soldiers of those same forces, to defuse a bomb. But for some reason all of these operators are from the same countries and task forces and should actually work together. Also the servers of this game are shit.

Trying to make our first steps like a true baby in a huge playground. Also, jumping into the void is the way

Four dudes commit war crimes on an alien planet for money.

You command one or several cities and gangs of creatures (some of them beasts, some presumably sentient), lead by a person who's armor and sword somehow makes the other creatures in his group stronger. These gangs capture other cities and fight other gangs, but they're very civil - they let each take their turn at it.

Some old nut job sends you to get a briefcase to save your village.

Cyka B blyat!

Gas station tf2

You are a crawling microchip that possesses animals with cool abilities

Bumfights on an island where losers become zombies.

Go to waypoint simulator with blackjack and hookers.

"I'd kill for a back tattoo like that!"

Squid and octopus shooting each other

Squid commits racism and tries to seal octopus away for eternity

A fighting game for kids where a bunch of adults went to the tournaments for years and molested a bunch of kids

You know all those books and literary analysis you had to do in Englidh class that you hated? Yeah what if we made a game about those guys? Oh and don't worry, we got guys from all over the globe, so we're going to make you relive that pain regardless if you're from Spain or Korea. Oh you liked that part of class? Good news! We made Rodion Raskinolov an anime waifu!

Alternatively: solving a centuries long race war in the only way we know how - with 13 year olds and 90's themed warfare! It's not a child soldier if the military doesn't know about it! We swear this is deadly serious we gave the kid a FN P90

IFR or VFR is the question.

Mario finds out that Toads are very racist and sexist rednecks

It's like Mad Max, except you have no guns or ammunition and so are mostly reliant on turtle carcasses and fruit peels instead.

A wacky woohoo pizza man gets invited by his bro to a weird tower and they end up fighting because the brother really wants a necklace.

A drug-dependant war veteran works for another dose.

Flower boob trampoline

you make people eat things they hate and they kill each other over boulders in the visible vicinity. sometimes the higher power tries its best to kill them, other times you get 36 milk.

Go sailing to build your magical fork collection.

You're undead, and use magic and guns to fight aliens and gods in defence of a big ball. The big bad is made of ghosts (but not the kind you're friends with).

you wake up in a desert, and you get your face kicked in over and over until eventually you get enslaved

Child with jaundice is possessed and kills an entire race. Unless you decide to flirt with them, in which case you get to save said race and also get a new mommy.

Also there's lore or something? I'm not sure since all the puns distracted me.