What are some small things we should change about the human body?

LesserAbe@lemmy.world to Ask Lemmy@lemmy.world – 196 points –

Ripping off a post I just saw in the Isaac Arthur subreddit. Imagining we work out the technical ability. Examples they suggested were:

  • No periods
  • No balding
  • No nausea
  • No body odor
  • Resistance to obesity and muscle wasting
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Redesign the spine for vertical use. Don't put the eating and breathing tubes on either side of the same flap.

We should have tons of little breathing holes all over.

Imagine if no one snored?

While you can create spiracles that repel polar substances like water, you cannot protect them against surfactant like soap. No more showers unless you want to drown.

So you're saying I can kill a fly with some soap spray.

Wasps too? Those fuckers.

You can waterboard them with it. If you want to effectively kill them, I'd recommend using the tried and true neurotoxin option sold at your local grocery store. You can be your own Saddam Hussein without having to hide in the most random places after committing your war crimes.

Wasps, definitely, and it does basically suffocate them. We use a water, dish soap, and peppermint mix on paper wasp nests that form in our eaves.

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Never mind snoring, imagine how bad a cold would be!

Yeah but we would have probably made weird body suits to deal with that by now if it were that big a deal.

We're really, really bad at preventing problems, but were the best problem solvers we've ever found.

Seems just about every other animal is great at preventing problems. We're the opposite.

So we'd have to be naked to breath at full capacity?

Not necessarily. I'm far from sold on the idea, but lungs are able to take in enough oxygen to hyperventilate easily, clothes would reduce the maximum air intake to some extent, but from l full capacity would be max you need to breathe to max out your muscles - everything past that would be excess capacity

If we're going for redundancy and throughput, clothes probably would be more useful as a filter than being a limiter (and filtration is why I'm not on board with this design)

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Ability to regrow lost teeth

Just as long as I don't grow my wisdom teeth back. I don't want to have to have those removed again.

How about repeated full replacement every 5-10 years?

I love the idea of adults with loose teeth as their tenth set of teeth comes in.

Sorry my performance has been below average lately, boss, I'm just getting my 8th set of teeth.

I don’t know. That could become tiresome.

Ability to go to sleep when sleep should be gone to.

Or the ability to forgo sleep indefinitely. I've got too much shit I want to do and too little time.

Let's apply RPG sleep rules.

You can go for weeks without sleep, but when you do sleep, you awaken fully healed.

Got a feeling this would lead to 16 hour work days. And fuuuuuuuck that.

Nothing beats the feeling of waking up after a good sleep.

How about, you only need naps and you always wake up feeling refreshed.

AND ONLY DREAM ABOUT PUPPIES AND SUNSHINE!

RFC, pull request to add git.

Reasoning: Having a built-in versioning system would allow humans to rollback roll back undesirable changes and advancements could be made more easily

please comment or downvote if this is a bad idea

Hair and nails not constantly growing

Your body not over reacting to things (allergies and auto immune)

Hunger annoys me.

Like, yo, tummy: I have not failed to feed you in over 30 years. Maybe don't cause me physical pain and nausea? A simple grumble is fine until it gets actually serious, ok?

goes a few hours without eating

Tummy: panik

A simple grumble would be perfect. Sometimes I get really hungry annoyingly quickly, and other times I don't get hungry and go way too long before remembering to eat. It'd be really great if I could just program my body to just give me a lil popup reminder after a certain number of hours.

Sometimes strokes can destroy the area of the brain that controls hunger. They require alarms to consistently eat, sleep, etc. I remember one story about a guy who put all these alarms on his watch. One day, his watch runs out of batteries, so his alarms stop completely. A couple days later, he calls the hospital because he couldn't get out of bed. Turns out he hadn't eaten anything the whole time. In short, you'll probably forget to eat without any signal you have to.

I will tell you, it's not that hard to train your body to treat hunger differently. You just need to fast now and then, most religions have guidelines for this. It doesn't take much to give you hunger resistance, and it makes a huge difference... You become less affected by low blood sugar and able to ignore hunger when you need to

After your body adjusts, hunger becomes cyclical - you feel hungry, maybe even nauseous, but then it goes away after a couple minutes. If you're doing something, it's so easy to ignore you forget about it

Right? Im very cool with rhe whole balding thing but for fuck sake can I not be Chewbacca walking carpet from the neck down?

So you want hair and nails to grow consciously?

Like if I want to grow my hair out, I need to actively concentrate on it for a year? Or can I grunt out a moustache like a cartoon? Both are problematic.

You consciously initiate the process and then it grows on its own, with the option to manually stop.

Ooh can I be Rapunzel/Wolverine? Both at the same time, that is. Oh and I'll take Dumbledore's beard.

I would like the ability to change the speed of growth. Like, when you overeat, I'd love to just crank up hair and nail growth to burn away the excess

No more biting down on my tongue or cheeks when eating. Most annoying glitch ever.

Omg yes this absolutely. I eat to nourish myself and survive and am punished randomly by self-inflicted mouth wound that lasts for days/weeks => evolutionary failure at its finest.

Insult to injury when the food is actually something healthy like a salad instead of fries.

Let's put a cap on how much excess energy the body can store as fat. Sure, some amount is fine and has a number of uses, but just let me poop some excess calories out. I'd only need more if I were to hibernate.

Thinking on it, I want to hibernate too, please.

While we're at it from animals, how about upping some of our regeneration? Teeth don't regrow? Naw, constant regen please. I get too big of a cut and I get a scar? Let's let everything regrow from being lost if you can survive without it. Also why doesn't the brain heal? Most important part of the body and each crack's there for life. Let me get my serotonin back already, slacker.

Also what's with this getting assigned a gender thing? You don't even get to know what it means before you have one! And then we build society as if this coin flip was the seed to the tree of life. Let people choose and switch naturally, please and thank you.

  • Separate holes for eating and breathing
  • Separate sewage system from entertainment complex
  • Remove mental health disorders
  • Improved empathy

Good day, are you talking about urine sewage system and/or anal intercourse?

How about a system which fully harvests nutrients, then compresses waste into smooth, solid, compact, sterile pellets which leave no residue and don't smell bad?

i think that’s the core issue. Whatever kind of sewage system you have is going to be a source of entertainment for some people

Well, one can hardly argue with that, kind sir.

I disagree - one hole for everything. Just imagine how many less medical clinics you need to go to.

Yes, I'm American.

Being able to shoot lasers from my tits would be cool.

as if women didnt have enough of a problem with people grabbing them and going pew pew, pewpewpew before!

You can already shoot FOOD from them! That's pretty damn impressive.

But yeah, lasers would be cool.

is this only for boobhavers, or anyone with nipples?

Add more holes to the body.

No more cancer please.

there's almost a vaccine for that

"is curing patients a viable business model?"

Nop, preventing them from dying is though.

This is so fucked up but yeah I can see them settling for research on a drug or treatment that just keeps you from reaching Stage 4 to where you become a lifelong consumer of said medical company.

Very short mating season. The amount of people is too god damned high.

Or just have a built in birth control switch that has zero side effects. Of course, it would have to be entirely controlled by the individual so as not to turn into some dystopian population control mechanism.

OK, but only if it's like May or June. No one needs that shit in February.

We should not get our adult teeth at 7 then no more ever. We need at least one more set.

I don't think balding is useful, agree that could go.

Fertility should be manageable without using all the devices, hormones, etc. Like it should be a positive choice not a default state we have to harm ourselves to avoid. And I don't think we need menopause either. Just turn on fertility only to get pregnant.

(ETA- I also think sexually transmitted diseases should not exist at all, they seem like religious fundamentalist biological warfare, but not sure what change in a human body could accomplish this and leave the pleasure intact. )

We should not get our adult teeth at 7 then no more ever. We need at least one more set.

Just be a shark at this point

Kidney stones, gallstones, whatever the fuck the body does of "Lets build a rock inside the body that can fuck us up" needs to stop.

Yeah, can we at least not have so many pain receptors in along the kidney and baldder tract?

Disagree: when something's wrong there, you really want to know.

Check back after I've passed a kidney stone, though, as experience may temper that!

Disassociate. And do it a lot.

Or have meds.

Cannot recommend and I'm sure mine was minor.

The ability not to pee myself every time I sneeze, run or jump after giving birth vaginally would be pretty nice. Even without doing any physical therapy.

Appetite is 100% linked to calories needed. You still enjoy food, but the moment you swallow enough calories for whatever you did since the last time you ate, you have zero appetite and anything put in front of you loses all appeal.

Terrible for survival situations, great for modern life where an abundance of food is a bigger problem than a scarcity.

Yes, but with a tweak.

Being able to tell how much food you need in advance would be better, so that instead of thinking that you're really hungry and piling your plate, you only buy or prepare as much food as you need. That would cut down on food waste too.

Maybe it could be based on the average daily calories used each day over the past month to replenish exactly what's been used plus predict ahead until the next meal time?

My appetite is at least 90% based on calories needed, since I was around 25, I 'm over 50 now. My kids laugh at me when I sometimes say I'm still full 6 hours after eating, but sometimes I am. Or eat, then eat ten minutes later. And usually I stay at the same weight unless intentionally bulking or cutting.

One exception - I lose appetite when stressed, and rarely but but sometimes have anxiety around eating still. But most of the time, my appetite just follows my calorie expenditure. Can't be the only person like that, it seems a normal state?

No, you are fortunate. I'm always hungry, I have to consciously resist the urge to eat constantly.

I am sorry, that sounds dreadful. Always you have had hunger? Eating does not cause satiation? I also can feel empty without being hungry sometimes, it's honestly a good feeling and best state to fall asleep.

Yes the tuned appetite should be universal.

In the interest of full disclosure - I did reach it coming out of anorexia so not overweight but underweight, but it has settled out to keep me at a healthy size as an adult. Except for a few very stressful years in my early 40s I lost some but bounced back. I think more people, at least in the US, are coming from the other side and I don't have experience with that.

Always. Haven't always been overweight though, that started in my late 20s. When I was young, I could eat nonstop and stayed skinny mostly because I was riding a bicycle nearly every waking moment.

(+) baby pouch, like marsupials'
(+) limbs regrowth capacity, like salamanders'

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Manual/deliberate sperm/egg production.

Manual/deliberate control over fat creation and storage.

Manual/deliberate control over fat creation and storage.

Monkey's paw on this one is that you'd end up having some pretty fantastic explosive diarrhea as the bacteria chow down on your energy loaded waste.

Nah, that's just with stuff like alli. What your guts absorb goes into your blood stream, you'd piss it out if your liver doesn't process it into fat... For reasons we don't fully understand, our gut microbiome stays in our gut.

If you mess with absorption, that happens... If you mess with the fat creation pathways, you just pee out sugars that would've been turned into fat

Only for half of protein and carbohydrates that can go into the gluconeogenesis pathway. That'll increase uti incidence, shred your kidneys with proteinurea, and lead to ketoacidosis when you're dealing with the other half of the proteins and all the other lipids, which before it kills you will allow you to excrete that waste from you lungs while you smell like you've been huffing nail polish remover. I think the out the butt option is generally preferable.

Source? Garcinia Cambodia seems like an all around win, but I'm willing to do some serious reading on the subject... The effects are relatively small but statistically significant in clinical trials with almost no side effects, and I recommend it left and right.

I've certainly never smelled like acetone (I'm extremely sensitive to smells) but you seem like you have a cohesive opinion on the topic, I feel like we might both be right and there might be a learning opportunity here

And if I am making a trade off with my health, I'd like to know

It's all about degree. Essentially what I'm talking about is severe dysregulation of lipid/protein metabolism that is generally only seen in type 1 diabetics, but it's the natural extension of extreme lipid and protein metabolism. I'm not familiar with that supplement, however.

As far as you watching yourself for it, don't worry, you'd notice being acidotic. I've seen it plenty of times at the hospital and you'd be huffing and puffing the acid off with terrible stomach pain and be generally having a bad day. While that supplement is associated with urine acetone increases, it's not quite the degree that I'm taking about.

Essentially, inhibiting fat production and storage and eliminating it result in very different effects. Insulin, by the way, is a very important mediator in fat production and storage. It's why so many new diagnosis type 1 diabetic children are often underweight.

So... I'm confused. Inhibition of turning sugars to fat in your liver is very different from diabetes. In my understanding, that's absorption of sugar into your cells

Is there a weight loss drug out there that mimics diabetes?

That's a complicated question, because yes there are weight loss drugs that mimic certain aspects of diabetes, but through different mechanisms of action. A good example is a SGLT2 inhibitor medication, which explicitly creates glycosuria in a non-diabetic person, which is kind of a defining feature of diabetes mellitus. While that's a generally very effective drug and should be used more for obesity control, it will also increase incidence of UTI and (due to a loss of sugar and thus forcing metabolism of fats/proteins) ketoacidosis.

The insulin/glucagon relationship is why diabetic ketoacidosis only shows up in type 1 diabetics and not type 2 (they get what's called hyperosmolar hyperglycemic state), and is an important part of liver fat production. Ketoacidosis is generally associated with that but is also present in starvation and alcoholics that don't eat actual food.

The greater point I was making wasn't about carbohydrates turning into fats. It's that most fats and about half of proteins cannot be turned into carbohydrates. They must be metabolized into ketones and then acetone. If you absorb them and cannot store them like in the OP's hypothetical, you'll end up having to immediately metabolize them and will end up with ketoacidosis.

Manual/deliberate sperm/egg production.

I'm not an evolutionary biology expert, but my armchair thought process says that this trait might not survive the evolutionary pressure. The burden of child rearing is quite high (specially these days).

Oh totally. Absolutely would decimate the human population on earth. And that wouldn't be a bad thing if it meant people only had kids they could actually take care of.

I have one: ingrown nails and nail infections can go fuck themselves.

I have had FIVE consecutive toe infections in the last 18 months or so. I'm so done with it lol.

But on a broader scale, some people die or lose limbs from stuff like this, so it'd be nice if that didn't happen anymore.

I had a problem with this, just got the nail removed, it was best decision I've ever made.

Thanks for the advice! I have an appointment in a week to do just that :)

Better foreign body-own body recognition by immune system. No more auto-immune, no allergies, MS, Lupus.

This. The list of medical issues that would go away if the immune system were properly tuned is enormous. But since it isn't, it errs on the side of attack to keep us alive... and in the process sometimes kills us or just makes us miserable.

Micro-organisms taking a shit on our teeth doesn't cause cavities.

Just brush your teeth bro it’s real easy takes like 2 mins

On that note, can we make teeth less fragile in general? Mine are all messed up from grinding them at night and from brushing way too hard as a kid. :/

Appendix not coming from the factory is a big one. A slightly better immune system that can get through the blood/brain barrier and kill rabies/amoebas, and other brain infections like TB (without shredding brain tissue) too. If a virus like rabies gets past that barrier, you are 1 0 0 % B O N E D as your immune system is largely locked out.

Wider uterus/vagina too. Human babies have massive heads that don't fit through too well. It's like an orange on a toothpick. Making a smaller baby could be a possibility, but survivability would potentially go down.

For very tall people: a larger and stronger heart organ. A second one acting like a smaller turbo would also help. Heh. Failover cluster hearts. You'd probably have to have stronger veins and tissues as a result though.

this. i cant believe their still shipping that deprecated piece of bloat to production.

A lot of great ideas here, but also sinus are such a terrible design. Please no more sinuses.

Definetly periods, stupid design and incredibly rare in mamals anyway.

Also, a change of our metabolism, our current way to deal with excess energy is outdated. And maybe make us resistant to cancers, that shit sucks.

Tonsils are obsolete, also:

Hmm I don't think we're anywhere close to v1, were like, at best, v0.6 Alpha lmfao

No more accidentally biting my tongue or the inside of my cheek while eating. Sometimes I'm just excited for some good food and it just gets completely ruined :(

I don't care about balding (and I have been since 20s). Just a healthy body reset every decade or two/whenever necessary. Get the metabolic rate up, clean up all the junk from the environment that has polluted the DNA and reduced the telomere lengths (whatever the correlation/causation there). Just a "take the body to the shop" type of repair possible. A chance to live for centuries.

Body hair should have multiple sliders like a video game avatar. Wanna be furry all over like a Persian cat or a poodle? No problem. Want to be smooth as a dolphin? Also no problem.

Pelvises that can accommodate both upright walking AND the size of human brains without, you know, killing the humans during birth.

I still find it insane that babies developed compressing skulls before their mothers developed wider pelvic bones

Who needs wider pelvises when you can break your child's collarbone instead?

Source: My collarbone broke when I was being born.

Nasty. How sturdy are infant bones? To they break easily? What's the healing process?

I'm not sure, I wasn't really paying attention since I was brand new lol.

But the doctor wasn't worried. In fact she told my parents that within a few months it would be impossible to tell my collarbone was ever broken.

The Internet says children typically wear a sling for 3 to 6 weeks for a broken collarbone. I'd assume my parents just swaddled me or something. I'll ask them.

This is why I was writing : "(+) baby pouch, like marsupials’ ..."

Ability to regrow lost teeth and no more wisdom teeth.

Ever think that wisdom teeth were supposed to be the replacements from back when our life expectancy was like 30?

So you both want to do away with replacement teeth and also have replacement teeth. Huh.

Endogenous vitamin d(3) production regardless of light exposure and vit c production

I think our lack of vitamin C production is a feature and not a bug because we basically can't eat too much of it. But animals that produce it like rats can get cancer from eating too much.

I'd much rather produce B12 than C

5v USB charging port.

This would actually be amazing, calories-powered, you can charge your phone and also burn calories at the same time

Obsolete in a decade, so make it hot-swappable.

(Because cold-swappable requires a shutdown)

replaceable parts, clorophyll, and maybe double jumps

replaceable parts

I'm a twin. Guess who can donate a kidney my clone won't then reject? Even without drugs.

I think the solution here is an own-grown organ bank: kidney, pancreas, a lung; whatever. Sign me up!

I'm pretty sure the major things that need to change are in the brain. Predeliction for violence and hate, addiction to controversy and toxins, and whatever makes people stupid enough to support facists.

That would require a significant remodeling of the neo-cortex. Pattern seeking got us out of the stone ages, but it is killing us in the modern era.

Iirc there are some reptiles with two sets of eyelids on each eye, the inner one being transparent, so they can close just the one while under water or in like dusty/windy conditions, but still be able to see.

Humans need in on that action.

We used to have that. It “devolved” into that lil bump in the corner of your eye by your nose bridge.

Sigh... we got rid of the cool shit, but hung onto time-bombs like the appendix. WTF, ancestors?!

Believe it or not, we’re beginning to understand the appendix more and it may not be as useless as we were told.

https://lifeandhealth.org/lifestyle/the-appendix-the-untold-story/08288.html

Yeah that's been the leading hypothesis for a while now, but even if that's its intended purpose, I'd argue it still does more harm than good. I work in the OR, so I might be a bit biased by only ever seeing the surgical side of things, but we take appendixes out ALL THE TIME because like to inflame and rupture, which without surgical intervention means your abdominal cavity is now full of poop, and then you go septic, and then you die. Those little fuckers are SUPER dangerous.

Intestinal biome is definitely important - if it gets fucked up bad enough, some patients need a fecal transplant, which is exactly what it sounds like: they take a donor's poop and shove it up the patient's ass deep enough enough for it to pass and hopefully shed enough microcritters to seed a new biome.

...but we don't get paged a 3am to rush to the hospital to frantically set up for a fecal transplant because some dude rolled into the ER needing a poop donation. We do get get those calls when some poor bastard rolls into the ER writhing in pain because his appendix is stretched to capacity and is getting ready to pop; or has already popped and we need to flay his abdomen open to clean him out.

So yeah, I'd vote to just make them not exist. If hospitals have to take on the occasional extra fecal transplant patient, I'd call that a fair trade.

It's called a nictitating membrane. Cats also have it to protect their eyes when they fight

Optimised learning throughout our entire life. Better focus and improved memory to take in knowledge more effectively

Our bodies need some trace metals, problem is it can't differentiate between metals it needs and metals that will kill it. "Hell yeah, delicious zinc" as it noms down on lead instead of pooping it out.

we need more micro-plastics in us

Deactivate-able hair follicles

Like chromatophores so you can have hair where you want and not where you don't. Maybe it just takes a long time to transition 🤔

  • avian lungs and eyes
  • salamander healing
  • shark immune system
  • proper joints for knees and elbows.
  • feline hearing
  • endless new teeth.
  • turtle like aging
  • low fertility

proper joint for knees and elbows

How about we perfect the joints we've got by having ankles which don't just give way if you stand on a funny shaped rock or similar?

Basically the only joints we got that are good are the hips and shoulders. The rest of the joint are what evolution could do (so far) with the bag of bones from fish flippers.

The ability to breathe underwater - or if that is too much of an upgrade to ask for, the ability to hold your breath for much longer periods of time so that we could spend significant time underwater.

Especially seeing as the planet's surface is over two thirds water!

Boobs just stay full and up, despite aging, breastfeeding, etc. if we are going to have periods, at least make them painless. Cells just shut down cancer every single time it starts, making it obsolete. You wouldn’t get out of breath at the top of a staircase/big hill if there’s anyone nearby.

Easier to just make them a lot smaller. Other primates nurse without the extra fat in the boobs. But I like the idea of much more resilient skin, it should bounce back endlessly. No reason for it to get fragile or lose tone, sagging achieves no purpose. Can we fix acne and rosacea with this patch, too?

You wouldn’t get out of breath at the top of a staircase/big hill if there’s anyone nearby.

Instructions unclear - new energy vampire mode unlocked

Penis size, premature ejaculation, long male refractory period, and ED.

Wait that's not all guys? /s

Baby teeth last longer. What's this bullshit about your first set of teeth lasts 5 to 10 years, then you're supposed to make it 60+ on the only other set you get? I'd make baby teeth last about 20 years.

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Complete body function control. Like no more emergency shits, you can time the bowel movements and just go once every 36 hours.

Also the reservoir guys have when we stand up pissing. How bout we don't have 20ml piss left in the urethra when we retract the penis?

Improve the birthing process so you don't have to rotate just to fit on the way out. Either make babies smaller or vaginas bigger (in which case penises would have to compensate I guess)

in which case penises would have to compensate I guess

Brother, if you're penetrating the cervix, you are doing it wrong.

That one's entirely of our own doing! By having better healthcare, people who wouldn't be able to survive childbirth naturally are spreading their genes which leads to childbirths being harder and harder with every generation.

U got a sauce for that? My instincts are telling me that we don't evolve or mutate that fast lol.

Can I also get no aging, no unwanted body hair and flawless health?

Yeah, the slow and painful deterioration of aging Couid get right the hell out.

Yeah I'd like to go back to 15 before my autoimmune stuff started

No nearsightedness/farsightedness

No arched noses

Everyone can breathe through their noses silently

No pectus carinatum/excavatum

Digestive tract hits limit on sugar digested and rejects the rest

No loosening of sensitive hair follicles; make every scalp hair difficult to remove/fall out

Let me just say that if God was a city planner, he would not put a playground next to a sewage system

Arguably God is a city planner, and that is how he laid it out...

Make a full night's sleep like 4 hours or something. As long as our corporate overlords don't take advantage and make it a 12 hour workday.

Better repairing, see Deadpool. Cancer, missing limbs, teeth, w/e.

Change that double helix into a quadruple one for extra redundancy, making it harder for it to gain irreparable damage. Also, make it a loop rather than a straight line so the ends don't get shorter with each replication. And remove that dementia bug that has a greater chance of showing up the longer run time is

Sounds good. Not sure this counts as a minor change...

Maybe body odor could be an opt-in? For, like, sexy times between men who like that kind of thing...

I'd like to make bodily functions a bit less gross.

I think they are fairly well-designed. You have to be able to expel solids and liquids somehow, otherwise they'd build up inside you, and you might die if they couldn't be digested or sweated out. I guess they could be combined, like birds. But I don't think that would make it less 'gross' in a non-quantifiable way. Sweating is also a pretty effective way of cooling down. Other methods such as large ears as radiators, thin blood vessels on the forearms that must be licked to aid in heat transfer, and panting all have their downsides.

If you think about it, tailpipes on cars and vapor pipes on AC and heatpumps and furnaces are basically the same thing as our digestive system.

The only thing that could really be redesigned is to have them be much more efficient, like some animals, which can pull a lot more water and nutrients out of byproducts. That, and the ability to extract stuff like heavy metals, microplastics, and forever chemicals, which get stuck and can't always leave.

Waste does not have to leave residue behind and stink. We ought to be able to extract more nutrients from digestion, and we could probably make an implant to carbonize waste, compress it into pellets, and even wrap it in a biodegradable capsule before disposal. I do like your point of dealing with hazardous materials.

If the body couls generate muscle without needing to excersize first that'd be cool. But I guess that's why steroids were invented and those have some side effects

A utility panel with usb ports, hard reset button, xd card slot, s-video port, etc, could be very useful.

Maybe installed on a butt cheek or back of a calf?

In all seriousness, a spinal realignment feature. Something that resets the joints & muscles in your back to factory default.

Just make it repair as well as the "immortal" animals out there (they can obviously die of accidents or diseases but not of old age).

Remove taste buds. Whole species have been threatened due to that.

I'm not sure I follow... Like we wouldn't kill animals if they didn't taste so good?

Some of them at least. Some diets are improvised out of necessity, but then again, we also have restaurants, which are not a necessity. If one animal is plentiful and does the trick, we shouldn't have to go to a restaurant to eat an exotic animal that isn't plentiful.

Periods. Fuck periods. There has to be a better way.

I want a cancer ray for people I don't like

you might be the only person who added weapons. That's incredible, if this was reddit, cancer ray would have been post 3 or 4, max.

Tbf I stole the idea from that clip from the Harley Quinn TV show (I think that's what it was at least)